As we go on, we remember all the time we spent together, had
together spent. We're gonna eventually figure that out. I don't think it's spent,
but it probably should be, right right, But Mac, today we
are recording this episode live to tape in front of a big old studio audience.
Yes, yes, yes, yes, probably hear them laughing all the
time, oohing and ayeing at the marvel that is Mac and Goo. But
it is the final day of November, the final day of November, and
it just dawned on me today that I should shave my mustache. Yep,
I shaved mine prior to a wedding I had a couple of weeks ago.
Yours is going strong, though. Yours looks like almost wings of an angel.
It's so large. Yeah, mine right now might be the longest it's
ever been. And it is in my mouth. Oh, you haven't trimmed
it at all. If you start trimming it, then it's a take house.
You take a little bit off this end, a little bit off that
end. Sure, and I've been doing that for years. I said this
time, I'm not even gonna trim it. I'm just gonna shape it.
And that's it. Whatever is hanging over my lips. That's just But now
I kind of have to call it quits. So when you go to the
baba, yeah, do you have him trim you up on? Oh my
god, no way, that's an xpra ten bucks. Oh but it's so
satisfying and they can get it getting back over here, he has money,
just a waste on barber shaving his face. Well, they're already shaving my
head, so I'm coming in at the low low price of like twenty five
thirty bucks. I could afford another five ten to fifteen bucks. But every
once in a while I'll have him do the hot tile shave. Goad.
It's dynamite. Actually, that's a good point here, is uh you are
bald? Yes, So when you go to the barber shop, do you
pay for a normal haircut or just for a shave. I basically pay for
whatever their bottom one is. It's like the cheapest one on the menu.
I only go probably, I probably go every third time. So I'll shave
my head and I'll keep up with it. And then every once in a
while I get lazy, gross too long, and I don't feel like doing
it at home, so I'll go to the barber. So yes, I
will get back in my cage zoo keeper. I will once again live in
a society, and I will take this cookie duster down because I've had enough.
All right, fair enough, So next episode, next news dump on
Monday. Don't be alarmed, don't shit your pants when you see this beautiful
ghoulish face again, by the way, very very yet another again, very
successful November for Ryan Davies. Yeah but cast, congratulations and good work by
him. One go three, yeah, chop three, King of Queen good
Middle Street, entertained time do And I'm mass and we are the Mac and
Goo program. We bring you friendship yup. And today we're gonna be bringing
you some of the things we've watched over the last couple of months that we
haven't got a chance to talk about literally months, six months. We made
a list and we have fourteen things. So we have two episodes here.
We're doing half of them roughly today. We'll do the more relevant ones I
guess here and then get to the ones that no one cares about in another
episode. Plainly keep it shut telling you run now. Thanks the terrible I
Also, I think I did the rundown pretty good by doing something that we
both saw. I saw you saw both saw I saw you saw both saw
little Ping Pong battle here. It's nice, it'll be nice back and forth.
Uh good, we'll be starting off today The Killer. The Killer is
currently streaming on Netflix. This is a rated R action adventure in crime movie
with a runtime of one hundred and eighteen minutes just under two hours on roddy
teazgew This is an interesting split eighty six percent from the critics, fifty nine
percent from the audience. I think I understand exactly why the split is the
way it is. On Metacritic. This is a seventy three and go.
This is a notable film number one because Michael Fassbender stars in. At number
two, it's a David Fincher film. Before I get the Fincher. This
is written by Andrew Kevin Walker Gou and we would know him from Seven.
He wrote the original script for Seven that Fincher ends up directing. Of course,
he also wrote Eight Millimeters, which he notoriously hates, that got bastardized
by the studio in Joel Schumacher. That movie's not very good. And he
also wrote Sleepy Hollow that was maybe the year two thousand. He's like barely
done anything since then. So I wonder if this was like David Fincher was
like, Hey, I want to lull you back out, see if we
could recreate that magic. This is nowhere near seven let me say that,
And of course this is directed by Fincher. Gut. I think you know,
I've obviously like David Fincher. Doork just did an episode on him a
few weeks ago. I think we might underrate how all time great David Fincher
is. If you look at his resume, there's maybe two three directors that
might have more, But like if you looked at his top three four films,
that's almost unrivaled by anyone. So he did alien three. Tough start
for him. But then he's got seven fight Club, Panic Room, Lords
of Dogtown, which is a very underrated, one, Zodiac, Benjamin Button,
The Social Network, Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, Gone Girl, and
Mink. Now, out of those, I would say, without a doubt,
if you're doing a mount rushmore, you have to include seven, fight
Club and the Social Network. Three of the I have fight Club a little
bit lower than most, but the Social Network and seven or two of the
best movies of all time. It's not even like up for debate Gone Girl.
I love Gone Girl. That's probably I think Gone Girl is the fourth.
That's probably my fourth. I love that movie. I don't think this
movie gets anywhere remotely near that top four. Yeah, but it definitely feels
like a David Fincher movie. So let me with the fifty nine percent.
I think what we're dealing with here is expectations, right, Yeah, You're
you're expecting this big, thrilling moment that you get in most Fincher films,
and I think this one really lacks it. It doesn't quite have two that
get close, like two scenes that get close. And I also think that
people went into this expecting maybe a John Wick like character, which you get
a little of it, but a lot really not really. Here, here's
how I've described the movie to no one, because no one's asked me about
it. It's a little bit of like a john Wick meets Bourn ultimatum,
elements of both of those movies, but not on the level of either of
them. There. So I describe it to people. No one wants to
talk to me about it. I'm on the subway holding up a sign saying
ask me about the killer, and no one fucking wants to know it.
Yeah, I'm like that guy with a sign on Instagram and fucking no one's
assmate. It's been weak. Don't see see all on emails synopsis good after
a fateful apply, Sorry reply all, let's see all after a faithful near
miss, and assassin battles his employers and himself on an international manhunt he insists
isn't personal. This stars Michael Fassbender as the titular killer. I like that
they don't really give him a name at all this movie. He just is
what he is. Tilda Swinton as the expert, and I loved when she
comes into the fold in this movie. Probably comes in maybe about halfway through,
two thirds through something like that. I'd say two thirds. Charles Parnell
is the lawyer named Hodges. He's sort of like Fastbender's boss for lack of
a better term. And then Arles Howard plays the client that plays a big
part towards the conclusion of this movie. Like I said, Gou, there
are elements of Fincher movies. There's a born element in here, a bit
Wickian of an element in here, but it never reaches the highs of really
the best of those those franchises. And on top of that, the ending
of this movie is kind of underwhelming. It sets itself up for a big
moment, and it does have a big moment kind of at the end of
the second act, it just never hits the high you're expecting of it in
the third act of this movie. Yeah, so it does have the big
action scene. Really only one big action scene here when he's going into the
fella's house with a dog. Awesome scene. Yeah, that's an awesome scene.
And then of course him working with the client. You get like that
gory type of scene right there, and then the Swinton scene that's really the
standout moment of the movie. And even not to spoil anything, but just
how they go about the end of that scene. But what I like the
most about this movie, and it's what Fastbender does best, is it's just
this quiet, stress inducing character and you're watching and like you're waiting for something
to happen. Now. It doesn't necessarily have that big payoff that say an
Inglorious Bastards or even X Men first Class, and obviously those are just roles
that he plays, but those are you know, big standouts that you have
with him, and you're kind of waiting for that. Like you said,
this movie's really well acted in eighty percent of it, eighty percent of the
story is really well written. I just feel like he's probably had this idea
or movie for years and never had an ending to it. And I feel
like he said, you know what, I'm just gonna make it without the
ending that I usually have in my movies, because it is like a you
understand why Fassbender's character does what he does towards the end, but it's not
satisfying whatsoever, especially for what happens throughout the film. So I don't know.
It just feels uneven at the end, and maybe a fantastic finish bumps
it up quite a bit, but it's just I don't know. I really
liked eighty eighty five percent of the movie, and then the last ten percent
I really didn't like. So I have it roughly thirty three hot dogs on
the year. It's right around my dirty dozen of movies I would I would
put it close to Dead Reckoning, where I prefer the story in this more,
I prefer the acting in this more, but Dead Reckoning has those big
spectacle scenes. So what do you want? Yeah, I liked Dead Reckoning
quite a bit more. I've got those thirty one hot dogs. It's it's
a good movie. I don't think. I think this is hard to dislike,
which is why, well, I think the fifty nine percent is kind
of bizarre. I could see not like in the end, like myself,
but not liking the whole thing seems seems like a mistake. This is my
number twenty three movie of twenty twenty three, and in that range there is
like Blue Beetle totally killer. This is just above like BlackBerry and Theater Camp
other movies that like I enjoyed to a certain degree, but aren't I don't
know, hard to recommend to people. I guess, all right, Mac,
let's move on to the next. This is more of a television streaming
special, and that is South Park joining the Panda Verse. Now, yes,
is this like Imagination Land level production? Like? Yeah, no,
so what they have? So? I don't know if you remember this,
but they had the fourteen special deal with Paramount. Oh that's right, that's
right, okay, And this is one of them. Yes, TVMA forty
eight minutes. I always recommended this and I'll tell you right now, this
is quality satire. This is really very very good, yes, because sometimes
they really missed the mark these days. No, I know, I would
say South Park. It's about fifty to fifty as far as miss Er nails
it these days. So directed by Trey Parker, written by Trey Parker,
Matt Stone, Brian Graydon, stars Trey Parker, Matt Stone, and April
Stuart. And what this is is Cartman keeps on having nightmares about him and
his friends, him and his classmates being replaced by diverse women. And the
whole forty eight minutes is a great satire on Disney Star Wars Kathleen Kennedy,
and then also the b storyline of Randy. He can't find a handyman because
everyone everyone now has their you know, big big jobs, but since the
pandemic, most people don't know how to do anything anymore. So the handy
men are all now billionaires and they're and you know, there's no one to
do these jobs anymore. And then what Randy needs to do is to go
into a multiverse to change things around. So it takes on Disney how multiverses
are lazy, and then also how people can't do shit anymore. And all
three of them they hit on all of them. That's good. Yea.
The only thing I'll say to that is I feel like multiverses are only lazy
when they're done lazily or excuse me, no, so that so, but
the whole thing is that. So there's a point in this. I'm not
gonna spoil anything, but Randy is going through this multiversal portal and all it
does is change his clothes. So he just keep going, Oh, no,
we're in different kinds of shorts. Oh, I'm a Chiefs fan in
this one. It's pretty good. Yeah, Okay, forty eight minutes,
so that's an easy watch. Yeah, forty eight minutes, easy watch,
well paced, it's really funny, and I haven't watched a ton of South
Park lately, but this was very good. Yeah. I haven't watched south
Park in a few years, so maybe'll maybe I'll get that's on? What
is that on? What's on? Paramount plus Paramount plus paramount plus good?
Next one up. You haven't seen this, I'll be interested to hear your
opinion once you do, because I think this is one that we both were
looking forward to after we saw the trailer. This is Bottoms. Bottoms is
currently streaming on MGM plus. If somehow you have that, I don't know
a soul who does. I believe I paid four ninety nine for it.
I'm prime because I was looking forward to it. Miss. I also put
MGM plus on this because I saw that. You know, when you google
it, that's what it says. Yeah, is MGM plus a thing?
I've heard Keith talk about it. I don't know if it's a thing,
but I've heard Keith talk about it. But if it ain't free, it
ain't for keif kude. This is a rated our comedy and it's been a
pretty good year for rated our comedy, So that's another thing here where the
bar set kind of high. It's only ninety one minutes, which is encouraging.
So everything going in you're like, all right, this is gonna be
pretty good. Trailers, pretty good on Rotten Tomatoes, ninety percent from the
critics, eighty nine percent from the audience on Metacritic, a seventy four.
So everything is telling you this is one of, if not the best R
rated comedy of the year, And boy was I let down. Kud.
This is written by Emma Seligman, she's also the director of this movie.
You wouldn't know her from anything. It's also written by Rachel Sabnat. She's
one of the lead actresses in this movie. I don't I think she was
in the movie Body's Bodies' Bodies last year, which a lot of people enjoyed
again, directed by Seligman. Synopsis. Two unpopular queer high school students to
start a fight club to have sex before graduation. So a lot of what
you see in this movie has been done before. It's just sort of a
queer twist on it. So I get why it gets made. But a
halfway through, you're like seeing this somewhere, I've seen that somewhere. There's
like nothing really new. Go ahead, goo. Two questions. Number One,
is Marshawn Lynch funny in this Marshawn Lynch is probably the funniest thing in
the movie. But even then, it's like it's one of those movies where
everything that's great is in the trailer and pretty much everything else is a letdown.
So this hands up against the second question, are you not the audience
for this movie? Not that like it should be able to hit with some
more? Okay, but I also am I'm not gonna say in touch with
the queer community, but I have queer friends, like I enjoy a lot
of these niche comedies like this and this. Really i'd like to hear some
queer opinions on it, but of course we don't have that are on the
program. Maybe we'll get back to you in a couple of weeks with that
dude. This stars Rachel Snat as pj i owe A Debris as Josie.
She's the girl from the Bear and you saw her and I think you should
leave this past season. She's sort of an up and comer. Also in
here, Ruby Cruz as Hazel Callahan, Haven Rose Lou as Isabelle, Kayak
Gerber as Brittany, and Marshawn Lynch plays mister G. Like I said,
everything going into this, and you know what, this also struck me of
good because it's that niche sort of queer comedy. I think people are afraid
to say they didn't like it because it's it's like filling a void. Is
not many queer movies, so I think people are afraid to say they didn't
like it. Because I didn't like this movie. I didn't hate it,
but I didn't like it, and maybe it's an expectations thing. And on
top of it, like I mentioned, this has been a pretty damn good
year for R rated comedies. You really liked what the hell is the name
of that movie? Joy Ride? I really like No hard Feelings. I
have them actually both pretty similarly rated, but those are two of the better
R rated comedies we've seen in the last few years, and this falls well
short of those two movies. Like Going In, you would have thought this
had a chance to be the best R rated movie of the year, maybe
best comedy of the year. And ultimately it's mostly lazy, pretty unfunny.
There's like a few huh but no like lols. So other than like it
being a queer story, there's nothing legitimately new in here or innovative. It
just was really disappointing. So I have this at twenty three Hot Dogs,
my number thirty five movie of twenty twenty three. It's just just above it
is like Knock at the Cabin, The Little Mermaid, Rise of the Beasts,
movies that just weren't that good, but I didn't hate. Just below
it is Asteroid City, another movie that was a pretty big disappointment. This
year for me. So I guess this is the depointment disappointment range, and
I don't know, you know, I'm if I'm totally off base, someone
please tweet at me. But I I have a hard time seeing someone loving
this movie. So the ninety eighty nine really threw me off. Now let's
go on to another R rated comedy. We are in quite a stretch,
and that is strays. Strays. I'll tell you what stray is really stray
far from the forty dog rating here goo. This is currently streaming on Peacock.
It is a rated AR comedy again with a run time of ninety three
minutes, just over an hour and a half, so sort of that sweet
spot, especially for R rated comedies. On Rotten Tomatoes, fifty three percent
from the critics, sixty nine percent from the audience. Now this is hard
to understand. For the opposite reason, this movie's not good. I understand
the sixty nine percent from the audience. The critics at fifty three percent this
struck me after viewing as like a twenty percent from the critics, This movie
fucking sucks. See I don't I don't outright hate it the way you do,
but I enjoy it. This movie is so void of comedy. This
movie is like a child wrote it. This thing is not funny at all
and everyone involved should be embarrassed. A fifty four on Metacritic is pretty high
for an R rated comedy that you or I didn't like. I would have
thought, again, this was twenty percent maybe in the thirties on met a
critic based on what I watched. Now, I don't know, like I
don't really know what the critics are seeing in this to say, oh,
this is pretty good. I recommend this. And again it's only fifty three
percent, but that's close enough to like almost being the tipped over popcorn.
Sixty percent would have said, hey, this is all right? Oh what
a dogs do? I think they shit a lot? They humps? Can
we do that for ninety minutes? This movie is lazy, the definition of
laziness. Yes and gou this got teased. It's on like the movie poster
from The Humans who Brought You Cocaine Bear in twenty one Jump Street now number
one. I don't know if I would brag about Cocaine Bear so quickly,
but twenty one Jump Street is legit one of the better comedies in the last
twelve fifteen years. Cocaine Bear compared to this is like, here's looking at
you kid. The fuck that movie is Casablanca. But let me ask you,
gu how they can claim that when this movie is written by Dan Perrault.
He's a former writer for Screen Junkies and Honest Trailers, two things we've
all liked for the last fifteen years. He also created Created an American Yeah,
uh so I don't know when went astray here? Goo, oh,
I get it. You see that the movie They're good? Yeah. This
is directed by Josh Greenbaum, and this should have been my red flag here.
He's done a bunch of New Girl, but he directed Barb and Star
Go to Visa del Mar, which is one of my least favorite movies ever,
So that should have been I shouldn't have watched this movie. But Will
Ferrell's attached to it R rated, so it wrote me in. But again,
go with those two that I just talked about and none of them being
related to Cocaineber At twenty one Jump Street, Ah, the fuck are they
claiming that this is from the humans who made cocaine Beer? In twenty one
Jump Street, dogs have red penises. You know that synopsis of this movie,
an abandoned dog teams up with other strays to get revenge on his former
owner. This stars Will Ferrell as Reggie, a dog, Jamie Fox's bug
a dog Maggie. Also we know they're all dogs, Randall Park as Hunter,
the fourth dog in the crew, and then go Will Forte is Doug,
Reggie's owner. Even Will Forte was not that funny and a role that
he should have been fucking hysterical in. Yeah, I hated this. I
hated every minute of it. There's really not much to say, honestly,
other than what Goose. I'll just add I didn't hate it, but it's
incredibly lazy and it does not capitalize on the R rating at all. It's
it's very lazy. Not only did I not laugh at this movie, I
didn't even chuckle once I got a few chuckles. I must admit that's because
you're stupid. That's because you're an eighty. It never claimed to be smart.
I gave this twenty Hot Dogs School fifty percent number thirty eight movie of
twenty twenty three for me right now, there's I only have two movies lower
than this on the year. I dislike this so much that I didn't even
put a hot dog score to it. I just put it at the bottom
of my list. It's your least favorite of the year. Yes, Uh,
have you seen We Have a Ghost yet? I haven't seen We Have
a Ghost? Movie is fucking horrible. That movie's worse than this movie.
But I'll probably like that because it's so stupid and bad. That movie is
really bad. I forget what the other movie I have underneath. Oh,
we'll talk about this in our next What have you been watching? The other
movie I have lower than this, and I watch you to watch it because
of your reaction to this is old. Dad's the Bill Burr movie. Now
that movie, and I'm the biggest bill Bird either is in the world.
That movie is fucking terrible. I heard this, I say, I heard.
It's very lazy. Oh, it's lazier than strays Goo. It's a
tough watch. Don't get me triggered right now, Mac, that's a line
from the movie, right I saw the trailer. It's bad. It's very
bad. Let's move on to another R rated comedy fresh on the pecock and
that is Please Don't Destroy the Treasure of Foggy Mountain. One hour and thirty
two minutes rated are on Rotten Tomatoes forty percent from the critics, ninety four
from the audience Metacritic forty nine percent. Is that good again for an R
rated comedy made by the video Short Guys from SNL forty nine on Metacritic,
I would say is high. I would have expected thirty five forty, So
thank you for describing them. By the way. The video Short Guys from
SNL director Paul brig Anti writers is Martin Hurley? He is it just Hurley?
Hurley? He Hurley? He I've never heard his last name before,
John Higgins and Ben Marshall also starring those three. It follows three friends who
live together and then go on a treasure hunt in the forest of a rumored
buried treasure. If you have seen either anything from Lonely Island or from Tim
Robinson or from Even Derek Comedy, Donald Glover's old comedy Troupe, this is
worse. Okay, So is there anything redeeming about it? Yes? So
there are a couple funny things in here, but like you said, there's
nothing really original here. Conan O'Brien is one of their fathers. That's pretty
funny, but it's the over the top acting that you get, say in
Mystery Team, Yeah, and I find those funnier. And maybe if I
watch those now, I wouldn't find them as funny. But it's just it's
the over the top comedy, the recurring jokes, and like, I'm not
the biggest fan of these three to begin with, but this is solid enough
to not say it's bad. But it's almost just like imitation of the other
three. Like they do things in here that you might find funny, but
then you sit back and go, that's a Tim Robinson thing, and if
he did it, it'd be funnier. So we started off this podcast talking
about how good of a year it's been for R rated comedies, and we
just gave fun pretty bad ones. We just fucking ruined ourselves. We are
such hypocrites. A lot of it is, actually is I love an R
rated comedy when it hits right, it's the there's nothing better. However,
it becomes a crutch in a moment where you're trying to write funny stuff and
you just revert to an R rated something a swear, a sex thing.
Yeah, And it almost stunts comedies sometimes. So there are versions of these
movies that might have been better if they were PG. Thirteen because they would
have had to write more creatively. And that's always the line you're towing with
an R rated comedy. So I would say, because if you have Peacock,
go and check this out. If you don't like, if you like
their sketches, go and check this out. Okay, all right, but
not my favorite. I'd probably have it somewhere in the middle of the pack.
I would take No Hard Feelings over it because I think No Hard Feelings
was more adventurous, took more chances. No Hard Feelings wasn't lazy goo.
I'll tell you that. Like I don't love No Hard Feelings. I think
there's a twenty minute stretch in that movie that's actually dynamite, But I would
take that and the chances that it took over this. The other thing about
No Hard Feelings, even though you're not a Jennifer Lawrence guy, but two
main leads in that act really well, which goes a long way. That's
also the best part about joy Ride is the main characters. They're all well
acted, so great. When you get well, you know, Bottoms,
it wasn't that Bottoms was poorly acted. Bottoms was just so disappointing. It
was I feel like a sixteen year old could have written Bottoms, and it
felt like me to me, it was gonna be a little more complex than
it was. So maybe it's an expectations things. But again, anyone that's
seen Bottoms, I want you to tweet at me and tell me your opinion,
because I would be I would be shocked if you liked that movie a
lot. I mean, tweet at us and give us your opinion on anything.
Really, we're all ears actually that one and this next one. Goo,
that's a nice transition right there. Goo. Yeah, the creator up
next is the creator. Right now, this is only video on demand and
you gotta buy it. You can't rent it right now, so those fat
cats in Hollywood just take our money. This will be a good tease for
when it is rentable in a couple of weeks, because this is another one
I actually want you to watch. I want to have a conversation about this,
maybe a longer conversation next time, maybe in the awards. Our awards
are coming up fast and furious that movie won't be in it. But still,
there actually is one award worthy thing in here that I'll get to in
a few This is a PG thirteen action adventure in drama. It didn't list
sci fi, but this is very sci fi. One hundred and thirty three
minutes, so two hours and thirteen. On Rotten Tomatoes, this is that
middling. I think everyone's confused. Sixty six percent from the critics, seventy
six from the audience. So not bad but also not good. How do
you feel about this movie? I'm just so fucking confused. On Metacritic,
this has a sixty three, so again in that range where it's not bad
but they're not really recommending it to you. This is written by Gareth Edwards,
his first writing credit since twenty ten a movie called Monsters, and also
Chris White skew this this is a career that you're really gonna like. He
wrote ants Nutty Professor to the clumps, Stop a boy, I'm in.
I'm in right there. You had me at Nutty Professor. Two. After
Ants, he wrote twenty fifteen's Cinderella. He also wrote Rogue one, which
we loved, most people loved, and the Pinocchio movie that came out a
year or two ago. This is directed by Gareth Edwards, who of course
directed Rogue One, another great sci fi movie in Godzilly. He did twenty
fourteen's God So I told you I've touched the Sun. I will not write
again. Gareth Edwards is kind of mostly operating in these sci fi worlds,
and I think he's got a pension for it. But like The Nutty Professor
two has quite possibly the best fart scene of all time. That's the Janet
Jackson one, right or she in the first? Yeah? No, that's
the Janet jacksone. That's when they're in the restaurant and the father starts a
big old fire. I know you like fires, starts a big old fire
because he farts on a candle. Janet Jackson looks so good in this movie.
Who's the Who's the woman in the first one? I don't know.
I know that Dave Chappelle's in the first one. Are you talking about Dave
Chappelle? Someone let us know about that one? Go synopsis of the creator.
Do you want us to do a Nutty Professor podcast? Tweet at us
right now and let us know you can do that. Smash that subscribe button
that on so and then dress up as me in honor of the Professor so
it's two people, but it's just Goo doing both. You know what,
I have to do it all in post or can I do it all live?
I don't that would be That would be very like I asked you a
question like three two one, and then what do you think about this two
one? It would take you months to edit that episode. That might be
something I want to do. I'm not gonna lie. What do you think
of that farts scene? Bets the bets? It's fine, that's pretty good.
I was just like that was me, it wasn't mac guys. Against
the backdrop of a war between humans and robots with artificial intelligence, a former
soldier finds the secret weapon a robot in the form of a young child.
Now, robot is not really the word for them. They look like humans
for the most part, so I don't know what the word. Yeah,
okay, that's a better word. This movie stars John David Washington as Joshua
Madeleine Una Voiles as Alfie Do. This girl just turned nine years old,
so she was seven or eight when they shot this. This is our first
IMDb credit. This girl was unbelievable. Carried the movie because you usually hate
children, not only but general This girl was the best part of the movie.
Jemma chan as as Maya. Jemma chan is usually always good. Alison
Janny is Colonel Howell. She plays a bad guy, which a lady colonel,
a lady colonel at Fi. Ken Nave as Harun you might remember him
from Inception or many number of other things. Stergel Simpson good Big year for
Strogier Simpson as Drew. He plays Joshua's like old soldier Butts. It's almost
like when they casted this movie, they just picked actors and then said always
good, Like these are people that are always good. Let me get to
that. Because I have a massive issue I really want I didn't read.
I really wanted to like this movie. I wanted to love this movie.
This movie looks and feels awesome and the way Rogue One does the visuals are
awesome. You're playing with some cool sci fi concepts and ideas. However,
I really really didn't like John David Washington. In fact, I might have
hated the performance. Oh he was so stale, devoid of emotion. This
was a poor casting choice. In general, I have liked John David Washington
in the past. You can't say I've loved him, but he hasn't bothered
me. Mac loves Ballers. Gude. He was so bad in this and
I like a better performance in that role would have catapulted this movie up,
like three or four or five dogs, like that's how much it brought it
down. Because it's him and the young girl for eighty percent of this movie.
It really and especially like the young girls acting her ass off and jdw
is just he's a cardboards piece of cardboard. It bothered the shit out of
me. And once again I really want to underscore that the child actor was
incredible. If this movie was a little bit better, you know, judging
off those critics scores, I think she would have gotten Oscar consideration. That's
how good she was. She was really fucking good. Additionally, gu it's
in that weird realm of at one hundred and thirty three minutes, which is
not a short movie. I actually felt like it should have been longer.
We needed some more time in the sci fi world, that atmosphere. We
need to play around with that a little bit more. And we also because
the story is kind of heavy handed, we needed a little bit more of
the emotional part of the store because by the end, it doesn't quite hit
the way you want it to. It's a nice conclusion, but it doesn't
hit the way it probably could have. So I think we needed more time
with both of those things. Because the story of the movie is a nice
sort of like three headed Battle, It's an intriguing story. So I have
this at thirty two hot Dogs, number fifteen of twenty twenty three. Just
above it is No Hard Feelings joy Ride. Just below it Screamed six,
Elemental, They Cloned Tyrone, TMNT, Mutant Mayhem, and Full Disclosure.
I gave all of those movie thirty two hot dogs. It's in this range.
You can kind of adjust those as you see fit, but this is
sort of in that tier where I really liked most of the movie, but
it had one or two things that really bothered the shit out of me,
and it just didn't reach its full potential all of those movies, Like I've
been thinking about this movie a lot since I saw it, which is what
I don't usually say about a thirty two dogger, Like this movie felt like,
ultimately at the end, if it had a better main performance, it's
like five thirty six that the main performance just fucking killed it. It's it's
leaving like a sour taste in my mouth. Now, the script's not perfect
either. It could have been a little more concise or, like I said,
spent more time. But to me, the main thing that drags us
down is John David Washington. Now, let's go to Disney's latest question market.
They've done another one since because they fucking shit these out. But uh,
live action remake. That's on a live action remake. Well you said
it after I said that. How about you let me finish my sentence,
mac the Little Mermaid, the Marmay before you say anything else. King Triton
is just slanging dick all over the world. It's got seven daughters for the
seven and they're all of different nationalities. Love that love that for him,
taste a little bit of everything. He knows it, he gets it tast
This is not Disney Plus. It is a rated PG. I don't even
know what you would. I didn't put the genres. That's on me one
hundred and thirty five minutes, so two hours and fifteen minutes. It's not
short, short at all. Rotten Tomatoes sixty seven percent from the critics,
ninety four percent from the audience to interesting scores on Metacritic of fifty nine.
You're right. This is written by David McGhee. You might know him from
Finding Neverland, Life of Pie, Mary Poppins Returns, and a man called
Auto, So I also know that his brothers Wendell and Willie. This is
based, of course, on the story by Hans Christian Anderson and the animated
screenplay by John Musker and Ron Clements. This is directed by Rob Marshall,
who has a penchant for musicals. You'd know him from Chicago Memoirs of a
Geisha, Pirates on Stranger Tides into the Woods, and Mary Poppins Return so
he has He's pretty accomplished director at this point. Synopsis. A young mermaid
makes a deal with a sea witch to trade her beautiful voice for human legs
so she can discover the world above water and impress a prince. This stars
Halle Bailey as Ariel, Jonah Howard King as Eric, Melissa McCarthy as Ursula,
Javier bardam It's King Triton, David Diggs as Sebastian, who I loved.
Jacob Tremblay as Flounder was pretty good. Aquafina as Scuttle didn't bother me.
So, oh she's dunk. Oh she stunk. But as Scuttle,
that's that's sort of what you're getting in Scuttle. So I accepted it for
what it was. I thought Halle Bailey as Ariel was great, but yeah,
she carried the majority of this. You know what would have been a
great prank in this movie is when Halle Bailey when she asked Ursula played by
Melissa McCarthy, who actually was not bad as Ursula, is this is the
type of role that she can get into because it's an outlandish role. It
would have been a great prank if when she asked for human legs, then
she looked down and she goes, I still have fish to it, tell
ya Goode. I actually came away from this movie and I heard I heard
nots of great things going into it. I came away thinking the first sixty
to seventy five percent was pretty good. Yes, I enjoyed it, not
great, but pretty good, watchable, and then the last like thirty forty
minutes pretty bad. Really, the final battle and leading up to the final
battle bad G looked horrible, right, and it hurt my eyes And I
was watching it on a plane. The best way to watch a movie.
I too, watched it on a on an aeroplane. That's really like,
it's hard to talk say anything new about The Little Mermaid, but that's my
takeaway. If you had made this shorter, so at two hours and fifteen
minutes, if you got this down to an hour fifty you probably have a
pretty darn good movie. And even at that, those those rotten Tomato scores
are crazy. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know how this got
ninety four percent from the audience. Honestly, it doesn't deserve it. But
on it I found it quite enjoyable for the most part. For the most
I liked a lot of it. Granted, I will say this, I
did skip most of the songs. The music wasn't great, Okay not great,
which is I mean, it's not like The Little Mermaid is the best
musical anyways from from Disney, so it's you weren't expecting much out of it.
But again, like this was right there. This was like bordering twenty
eight to thirty dogs for me as we were going through, and then the
last thirty minutes put it down. It's it might float. I got it
at twenty four hot dogs. It might float. It's it's like number thirty
four, Get Way twenty three for me, So I do have it at
twenty eight hot Dogs. I did really enjoy the you know, first ninety
ish minutes of this movie. I would definitely take a Laddin over it.
Aladdin, I think is a better live action one. Yeah, and then
this and The Lion King back and forth. I might take this just I
like the human elements much better. I don't like how they are animals and
they can emote. Lion King was much better. The best scene in The
Lion King is the beatle pushing the pile of poop. Lion King just did
what the original one did and it worked. Now, so that was good.
But it's better than this. And then I have it. I don't
know whatever on the year, it's somewhere in there. Let's get into Maxack
and ma sac could be anything. It could be a boat. And this
week watching Keep It Short Till You Run, Now, it's the exact same
thing we just did this episode anything Mack. I know I brought this up
many of times on the show, but I have a three year old son
who is beginning to consume media, and you know, comprehend what's going on.
So it is the holiday season. Whooped? He do hibbitty dop,
And I have been showing him some I would deem Christmas classics. Okay,
all right, what do he got on getting a gage? On? How
he feels about? How are you doing it? Doing like one every couple
of days? Like it depends on how much time we have at night.
Actually say right now, we showed him Elf and he's never sat through an
entire live action movie. Watch the whole thing. He loved it. Love
that, love that. He's a good one. You know what His favorite
scene was when Buddy the Elf threw up in the trash can because he went
to New York one time and he threw up to uh relatable relatable. Yeah,
so goo, I might have told you this before. Yeah, one
of my college roommates was from New York just outside of the city, but
do the city pretty well? Yeah, And his two favorite moments in the
in the movie are when Buddy almost gets hit by the cab it kills him
because it's like actually a thing that happens every day in New York City.
And that was unscripted too, was it really? Oh? Speaking of fun
facts, before we go any further, save your l thoughts, because we'll
have a full ELF podcast at the end of next week and we'll be doing
this episode from the Alamo Draft House down the sea. Oh how about that
for a tease? Right there? It's right, so watch it on YouTube.
It's gonna look beautiful. Big time, Timmy Jim, big time,
Timmy jin big time. Let's go on to a movie that not really a
movie. It's forty five minutes long. You can watch it on YouTube.
And my kid loves this. I love it as well. It might be
the most ambitious crossover of all time until we get to cartoon All Stars to
the Rescue, and that is Muppet Family Crisp from nineteen eighty seven. Just
everything about this. This is great family fun. It's a great family movie.
I'll give you that. I'll give me Muppets, Fraggles, Sesame Street.
You have a pre Rizzo voiced Turkey going nose to nose with Gonzo fighting
over a chicken. I'm sorry, are you frozen? No? I thought
you were gonna go on a tangent. I will say this though, is
that Karmit's nephew or son? The little frog that's there Yeah, Yeah,
it's a fucking wiener. He stinks speaking of things that I don't quite understand,
and that is nineteen sixty five's Charlie Brown Christmas. I don't get it.
I'll echo your thought here on Charlie Brown in general. I don't get
it. Charlie Brown. Well, I should say Woodstock and Snoopy were like
my grandfather's favorite characters. Yeah, I sort of get it, but Charlie
Brown in general don't really get it. Number one, my son loved this,
so credit to him. He's more complex than I am. I guess
it's just this how bored people were in the sixties that this was. Like,
this is twenty seven minutes of Charlie whining, just NonStop the commercialism of
Christmass This is like mean, I think, Chris, I think what Kaiu
is to our generation, that's what Charlie Brown is. Just a whiny fuck
Linus is a loser, yes, confirmed? And then like, do I
need more of the backstory? Why are all these kids so mean to Charlie
Brown. They all call him dumb, they all call him an idiot just
for buying a tree, Like, what is what is happening in this tough
message for the kids at all. Yeah, and then I even watch because
my son loved this one. I watched the follow up, the sequel to
this, the Spiritual Sequel. I don't know, but it's Christmas again,
Charlie Brown from nineteen ninety two, and it seems like the people that wrote
this one didn't see the one from nineteen sixty five. The character mode has
made no sense was fucking twenty seven years later. There was one part in
that though, where Snoopy took a candy cane and he danced like he had
a cane. So that's good. Snoopy and Woodstock might be the two best
characters, and they're in Charlie Brown. Maybe five percent of it, ten
percent of it. You get a little vignettes off to the side. Let's
move on to nineteen ninety six, and this just popped up on my Paramount
Plus as my son was eating breakfast. I'm like, yeah, you can
watch this, and that is Sonic's Christmas Special from nineteen ninety six. And
the best thing sucks really yeah, it's crass animation. It is just slapped
together, the voice over work, the writing, none of it. It
all feels cheap and half ass is probably right around where the animated series came
up. This is the animated series, yes, okay, and this is
the sillier one. I think there's two of them, but whatever, they're
both voiced by Erkle. And why is Sonic in this episode in this special
riding a bike in snowboarding? Those things are cool? I get it.
But he runs fast? Yeah, but he can still enjoy a nice snowboarding.
Why is he slowing himself He's on a mission. Why is he slowing
himself down by snowboarding? I don't think. Well, I haven't seen I
haven't seen the property, so I don't know what his goal is. But
maybe he's just enjoying a nice leisure snowboard. Robotic creates a robot Santa,
and he kidnaps regular Santa. Hear me out, Yeah, maybe he can't
run in snow. It doesn'tenough snowshoes. Are you saying I wasn't paying attention
enough to the fucking plot of the show. He might have explained it.
That's a good chance that happened. Also, Sonic never once said did I
do that? Snapped the suspenders? A fucking idiot? This thing's stunk.
I hated it, you know, what doesn't stink? You know what is
great? Yeah? Season two, episode fourteen from nineteen ninety two, Rugrats
the Santa Experience. Angelica is a bad ca and she even says it bad
guy. She is talking to herself in the corner and she's like, Cynthia,
I'm so bad, I'm so bad, Cynthia. She learns her lesson
though, because bad kids don't get gifts, they get coal. Did Raffi
watch this one as well? Raffi has watched it several times now, so
he's in on the Rugrats. He's in more specifically on this episode. He
likes it because Santa shows up at the end. Don't want to spoil nothing,
but Santa does show up at the end, and Angelica does get her
Cynthia dream house with the Jacozzie and satellite television. But when she opens the
garage, little piece of coal, Little piece of coal. This doesn't really
send a message though, if you got what you also Charlotte in this episode
Electric Oh yeah, Charlotte. She's on her cell phone for fifteen straight minutes.
She's talking in the background of the scene for fifteen straight minutes. I
guess that makes sense, though. The wealthy folks in ninety two probably did
have a cell phone. This is her talking herself up too for fifteen about
you know, being a powerful woman. Do you remember the first time you
saw a cellular device saved by the bell? No, I mean in real
life. No, I've seen beepers. I remember, like a beeper.
My cousin had a beeper. Everyone had beepers. I remember my uncle this
must have been ninety seven, had a car phone, so it was like
a cell phone, but it was like mounted in the car. I thought
it was the coolest fucking thing ever. The babies also set a trap to
catch Santa. But what happens is they catch Chazz dressed as Santa. Chazz.
Chucky too, fucking Wiener family, Chucky, It's just me. Next
time your wife wakes up with her hair, il Fragiley tell her she looks
like Chucky. Just both of them is whining constantly. Drew's pretty good too.
I like Angelica's entire family. Also, the parents once again same age
as us, so feel good about thirty four thirty three. Wow, we're
older than the older than the parents on And actually I really like the parents
on the rug Rats because it seems like they're doing everything for their children,
but they're just doing it for themselves. Yeah, they get to hang out.
That's why all the kids are hanging out. That makes me think of
myself once again. Also another electric character. I'm sorry to hang myself up
on this episode. This is a great episode of Nickelodeon television. You're talking
more about this than any of the movies we just talked about. Grandpa lou
fucking amazing in this. He tosses out two or three lines that are just
gangbusters. One of them. So they are getting a cabin for all of
them to stay at for Christmas, and they're like, I'll call the travel
service, I'll do this, I'll do this, and then Grandpa goes I'll
drink some magnog and fall asleep on the couch. Classic good. I'm trying
to think that doesn't make me feel that old thinking about it, Yeather than
the rug Rats' parents are the same age. I always feel old watching Friends
and thinking about how old they were Season one of Friends. What are they
supposed to be? Twenty five something? In Season one of Friends? That
makes me feel old. I think when I first felt old was when I
realized that I was older. Than the youngest athlete in the NFL. You
felt old at twenty one somewhere around there. When I realized that Cam Newton
was younger than me, I'm like, a fuck, I should probably buy
a house or something. I think the next thing for us feeling old,
as in when we're older than every athlete, every professional athlete. Brady was
saving a lot of folks. Yeah, we're getting up there, though once
we get thirty eight, there's only going to be like an NFL kicker younger
than us. And then finally an episode that my son really couldn't sit through
because well, it is about someone trying to get someone a secret Santa gift,
and that is reuniting him with his daughter who he hasn't seen in two
decades because of a war. And that is the Hey Arnold Christmas Special where
Arnold gets mister Huynn as a secret Sanna and what he tries to do is,
you know, like I just said, reunite him with his daughter that
were separated. It's an amazing episode. Did I cry? I fucking cried
again. I believe you. I believe you by the end of the episode.
Don't want to spoil nothing, but yes, he does get mister Huynn
back with his daughter. I believe her name is ma. I want to
say, Okay, the one the biggest distraction in this episode, and I
don't remember this from like later episodes, Helga's lisp is insane. Yeah,
I guess she's got a slight one. I wouldn't. I don't recall her
having a massive one though. Watch this episode you'd be like, what is
happening with these characters? I don't remember this? Yeah that I haven't seen
an episode of Hey Arnold in quite some time. Paramount plus, you have
great jokes from Gerald, who gets all of his family ties. What do
you do these days for family gifts? Does your family we don't do gifts
anymore. Yeah, that's smart, that's the way to do it. At
a certain age, you don't need anything. We talked about this the other
day. You get yourself what you want. Well, no, so we
do gifts for my parents, sure, and yeah, we've been so good
at getting them gifts the last like three or four years that we are setting
up ourselves up for failure this year. Sure, Bill's gonna be disappointed.
This year. We got Bill a fucking seventy five inch television last year.
Yeah, but doing eighty five this year, I bought him an iPad.
Oh it's pretty good. That's not bad, right, Yeah, that's pretty
good. Hopefully he's not watching this, even though I already gave it to
him. And then my mom, we have gotten her like two years ago
because she was working from home and she was working in like the dining room.
I would sneak upstairs every single night and I was I was making her
a home office. And then on Christmas Day? How did she not notice?
I was very very sneaky. Yeah, but she never just opened the
door. No. And then on Christmas Day I brought her upstairs and she's
like, how did you build an entire office in here? And I'm like,
whose room is it? Was it formerly Elena's old rum? Okay,
is your room still there? Yes? My room is still there. My
brother has my old room. Yeah, my brother's old room is now filled
with just garbage. It's just a storage room. My parents do the worst
job with, uh, you know, utilizing the square footage of the house.
It's just all storage rooms. No, it's not. We meant to
call A and E in there soon? Is that the station as hoarders yeah,
I think so. I meant to call them up soon because I'll tell
you what, Hoarders is a show. It's it's it's rare to make me
uncomfortable. That show makes me very uncomfortable, very uncomfortable. So I recommend
out of these. We'll talk about Elf next week. Mup at Family Christmas,
yes, Charlie Brown Christmas No, and come right at me. I
don't care. I don't like it. I don't like it one bit.
It's not entertaining to me. Like it's loose gobbledygook animation. I don't like
it. It's a technical term. Sonic Christmas is terrible. It's so much
better or worse than Charlie Brown. Charlie Brown's better. Charlie Brown is better.
And then uh, top of the list. Actually know, hey,
Arnold's probably the best one there. But Rugrats, I love it. What
would Raffie have? Number one? Rugrats? No? Muppet Family Christmas.
He loves it, Okay, all right, I like that. There's a
part of the Muppet Family Christmas where Kermit's wieneror nephew is singing jingle bells in
a very soft tone, and then Electric Mayhem comes in and jingle bell rocks
It love that. Yeah. Also the first appearance of Muppet Babies Mappe Babies.
Where can you find us? Mac That's my new thing every episode.
You can find us on Twitter and Instagram, at mac ngoo podcast. Every
other platform we are mac ampersand Gogo. It's max Shift seven good That includes
Facebook, Stitcher tuning, Cashbuckspeak or Google Play, iHeartRadio. We were on
Spotify. Spotify rapped came out. You was super excited about that. More
importantly, we are on Apple Podcasts. Get on that rate review, subscribe
five stars. If you do that, we'll get you a free Macagoo T
shirt from folks over at Watertown Sportswear. That's Watertown Sportswear on thirty four mon
obittreen in Watertown. Watertown Sportswar dot com experts screenprinting and embroidery tapublic dot com
doing a great job right now. Over Black Friday Cyber Monday, you all
went nuts and bought. I think you should leave stuff, so thank you.
You are lining my pockets. Check us out start a next week news
dump. There is some great Bob Eiger blame game going around that I just
want to just get in there. He's He's amazing right now between him,
who else is going crazy? Zack Snyder talking all sorts of nonsense right now.
So I would fight Zack Snyder. I think he's moved above Ryan Johnson
for me. I mean, I'm a I'm a huge Snyder fan. I'm
the Snyder fan of this podcast. I love the fact that he said he
would do a DC movie if it was The Dark Knight. Well, just
because you dove right back in on Ryan Johnson immediately too. I'm a huge
fan of him saying that he would do Daredevil if asked. Zack Snyder,
Zack Snyder fan. You know, well, I'm not gonna say because Scorsese
hasn't changed, but what Scorsese does, he is better than Zack Snyder.
A lot of filmmakers adapt and change and innovate and make new technologies. I'm
thinking of Peter Jackson, I'm thinking of James Cameron as someone who is kind
of on my shit list too, but at least they're doing the new things.
Zack Snyder has done the same fucking thing, same techniques for twenty years,
and it worked. It was cool twenty years ago. Three hundred was
cool. Fucking sixteen years ago. You know it's not cool that stuff.
Now that stuff is not cool anymore. Do something new. I think my
favorite director is tell me to go fuck myself, and that if I don't
like what they're doing, I'm stupid. I kind of respect that. I
respect. It doesn't mean I'm gonna like you. Ridley Scott and James Cameron,
you guys are my two favorite listen. I think James Cameron's a moron,
but at least he's an innovator. He's using and creating tools that other
people can now use like Peter Jackson's done, but man Zack Snyder's been using
the same shit for twenty years. Do something new, Brick. I think
it goes by jim Cameron, doesn't he You might Jimmy John Cameron. All
right, and I'll do it for this episode. Check us out next week
Tuesdays or Gruesdays. I abuse Kangaroo. Heye, please flip the cassette over
to side B to continue the adventure. One of these days you might have
to explain the abuse Kangaroo is thing that's from like five years ago, six
years ago. We're still recording right now. I can just do it right
now, a little postmac and good credit here. That is from when I
filled in for Davy in the eight episode of Dork. Oh, so that's
twenty seventeen, I think twenty seventeen, six years and Weei ships out a
transcript of their generated transcript of the recording, and I don't know, I'm
so much of a fucking mushmouth that it said that I said I abuse kangaroos.
So that's just my catchphrase now. It towards the end of the episode
for whatever, and you could go in and see that it had Goo saying
I abuse Caker Bruce. There's nothing, there's no phrase even like that.
I don't even know. It was one of the funniest things ever, Like,
what the fuck? All right, bye bye,