1 00:00:04,480 --> 00:00:10,119 Welcome to the Teachers Need Teachers podcast, where we help new and beginning teachers 2 00:00:10,199 --> 00:00:16,120 navigate through those crazy first years of teaching so you can maintain your sanity and 3 00:00:16,399 --> 00:00:27,519 personal life. Here's your host, him Lapree. Welcome to the Teachers Need 4 00:00:27,519 --> 00:00:31,920 Teachers Podcast, the podcast for teachers who don't want to just survive teaching but 5 00:00:32,119 --> 00:00:37,439 actually thrive. Today, I'm discussing what's led me to this point where I 6 00:00:37,560 --> 00:00:40,759 kind of want to quit, to be honest, and pretty much the only 7 00:00:40,799 --> 00:00:43,880 thing that I feel like I can do about it at this point. You 8 00:00:43,920 --> 00:00:48,320 know that I am trying to save teachers from quitting and that it's really a 9 00:00:48,399 --> 00:00:51,799 passion and a mission of mine. But I'm at the point where I want 10 00:00:52,119 --> 00:00:56,840 to quit, and it's something that has crept up on me because I didn't 11 00:00:56,840 --> 00:01:00,840 want to quit until probably like this last semester. But I'm really at a 12 00:01:00,880 --> 00:01:03,640 breaking point and I'm losing my damn mind. I'm not even kidding, like 13 00:01:03,719 --> 00:01:07,000 I feel like I'm losing my mind. So up until this point, I've 14 00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:11,799 actually been generally happy with teaching, even during the pandemic. I know that 15 00:01:11,840 --> 00:01:15,599 a lot of teachers were suffering during the pandemic, and they hated teaching online, 16 00:01:15,680 --> 00:01:19,680 and I can imagine that if you had to teach kindergarteners and this was 17 00:01:19,719 --> 00:01:23,879 like their first time going to official school and you had to do it online, 18 00:01:25,040 --> 00:01:29,439 I can imagine how upsetting and traumatic that can be. And if you 19 00:01:29,560 --> 00:01:33,879 had to teach students who didn't even participate ever when you were teaching online, 20 00:01:34,040 --> 00:01:37,159 I can see why you hated teaching during the pandemic. But for me, 21 00:01:37,400 --> 00:01:40,560 I was able to get my students so at least participate in the chat, 22 00:01:40,599 --> 00:01:44,400 and even though they didn't show their cameras, they still were there with me. 23 00:01:44,519 --> 00:01:47,359 And even when we came back to school, I was just so excited 24 00:01:47,400 --> 00:01:49,680 to see these kids and I felt like I got back into my groove. 25 00:01:49,799 --> 00:01:53,120 And I was still really happy when we came back. And I know that 26 00:01:53,159 --> 00:01:57,359 again some teachers they were faced with less than ideal conditions and they weren't happy. 27 00:01:57,400 --> 00:02:00,719 But I was able to maintain my life for teaching and all of that 28 00:02:00,920 --> 00:02:05,640 when we came back, and things are fine until this past semester, and 29 00:02:05,680 --> 00:02:09,039 I'm still trying to put my finger on it, but things just really started 30 00:02:09,080 --> 00:02:14,719 to get to me. So it got to the point where I would overreact 31 00:02:14,759 --> 00:02:19,439 to little things. I would definitely overreact to emails. We did have a 32 00:02:19,439 --> 00:02:23,520 lot of shuffling with our administration, and so we had a lot of different 33 00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:27,680 assistant principles in the past couple of years. So there was definitely that instability 34 00:02:27,840 --> 00:02:30,120 in my school, and that was something that just really started to get to 35 00:02:30,159 --> 00:02:35,560 me. I'm also someone who's really sensitive to tone in emails and things like 36 00:02:35,599 --> 00:02:38,560 that, and I just really felt like my administration did not have a hold 37 00:02:38,639 --> 00:02:42,879 on what was going on, and they didn't have control of what was happening 38 00:02:42,879 --> 00:02:46,520 in the school, and so that kind of created this sense of chaos, 39 00:02:46,719 --> 00:02:50,800 not just among the teachers, but definitely with the students, and it really 40 00:02:50,960 --> 00:02:54,120 was just getting to me. Now. I am someone who worked really really 41 00:02:54,120 --> 00:02:58,439 hard to not get upset about things that are out of my control, but 42 00:02:58,599 --> 00:03:01,039 it just started to creep in and it started to get under my skin, 43 00:03:01,120 --> 00:03:07,840 and I just became really overreactive and just not a really good person in general. 44 00:03:07,039 --> 00:03:10,919 I mean, we're talking about sending passive, aggressive emails and being really 45 00:03:10,960 --> 00:03:16,120 snarky and just jumping on little things that people were saying, and I don't 46 00:03:16,120 --> 00:03:21,400 know, just being the person that I don't like, being the kind of 47 00:03:21,439 --> 00:03:25,439 teacher that I don't like and don't appreciate. I have become that person. 48 00:03:25,560 --> 00:03:29,439 I'm not gonna lie like I don't like how I am right now. I 49 00:03:29,439 --> 00:03:32,560 don't even know if I'd want to be my own colleague or my own student 50 00:03:32,599 --> 00:03:36,479 at this point, and I dread coming to school. I used to love 51 00:03:36,560 --> 00:03:39,199 going to my school. I love my school, I love teaching, and 52 00:03:39,240 --> 00:03:43,879 I love my students, but just all of these things have just really started 53 00:03:43,879 --> 00:03:46,280 to get to me, and I don't want to teach anymore. I just 54 00:03:46,479 --> 00:03:52,319 I really don't now. Another aspect of school that also would probably want to 55 00:03:52,319 --> 00:03:54,120 make you quit too, is that the kids are different right now now. 56 00:03:54,159 --> 00:03:59,479 I saw this coming before the pandemic, that the kids were starting to just 57 00:03:59,599 --> 00:04:02,639 act up more than they had in the past, but definitely when we came 58 00:04:02,680 --> 00:04:06,400 back from being in lockdown. Now, for me, I'm still connecting with 59 00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:11,759 my students and they are participating and you know, doing their best. But 60 00:04:11,879 --> 00:04:15,719 I see how the other students are in my school, the other students, 61 00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:19,360 and these students they don't care about authority. Have you had this happen at 62 00:04:19,399 --> 00:04:24,040 your school too, Like they don't care that a teacher is walking down the 63 00:04:24,079 --> 00:04:28,240 hallway, and you know that doesn't make them stock from doing whatever Shenanigan said 64 00:04:28,319 --> 00:04:30,920 they're doing. They just really don't care. At my school, they're trashing 65 00:04:30,920 --> 00:04:35,720 the bathrooms, like not just vandalizing them, but just doing some really nasty 66 00:04:35,800 --> 00:04:39,519 stuff. And I don't know if this is happening at your school, but 67 00:04:39,639 --> 00:04:43,279 the kids at my school they just have no respect for it. They don't 68 00:04:43,319 --> 00:04:46,279 care, and there are any consequences either, so why should they care? 69 00:04:46,480 --> 00:04:49,319 And I know that the parents, you know, we can blame the parents 70 00:04:49,360 --> 00:04:51,680 for this, but I know that for a lot of them, the parents 71 00:04:51,759 --> 00:04:55,959 also don't know what to do about them. It's not like you can just 72 00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:59,160 tell the parents you need to discipline your child more a lot of them have 73 00:04:59,279 --> 00:05:01,800 tried just tell them that they need to beat the crap out of their kid 74 00:05:01,839 --> 00:05:05,480 to get them into shape, because that's not necessarily going to solve the problem. 75 00:05:05,560 --> 00:05:09,600 There's something up with these kids, and it's something that no one is 76 00:05:09,639 --> 00:05:14,560 really solved yet, and so we as teachers and the custodians and the administrators, 77 00:05:14,639 --> 00:05:16,879 we have to deal with this for the duration of a school day, 78 00:05:17,040 --> 00:05:20,600 and there's just no consequences for it, because no matter what you do, 79 00:05:20,680 --> 00:05:25,199 it doesn't matter. And another aspect that makes a lot of us want to 80 00:05:25,279 --> 00:05:28,120 quit is that, you know, the teachers are different too. We're not 81 00:05:28,160 --> 00:05:30,879 the same. Teachers have been burnt out ever since we came back from the 82 00:05:30,879 --> 00:05:35,040 pandemic. Like, yeah, there's always teacher burnout, but it's been really 83 00:05:35,079 --> 00:05:39,879 bad. I hear and read about it all the time. That's one of 84 00:05:39,879 --> 00:05:44,879 the many reasons why teachers are leaving in droves from the profession and why people 85 00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:49,560 aren't really going into teacher preparation programs to become teachers because they're hearing about how 86 00:05:49,639 --> 00:05:54,000 horrible it is. I know that a lot of teachers miss how it used 87 00:05:54,040 --> 00:05:57,120 to be before the pandemic, and so they have the sense of nostalgia, 88 00:05:57,240 --> 00:06:00,920 and so they're comparing the students pre pandemic to the student's post pandemic, and 89 00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:04,480 it's kind of a disconnect there because these kids aren't the same. We have 90 00:06:04,519 --> 00:06:08,680 to remember that the kids are different because of what happened to them. They 91 00:06:08,720 --> 00:06:13,360 were robbed of two years of their childhood. They didn't learn good coping strategies, 92 00:06:13,480 --> 00:06:17,120 and they were shown unhelpful and probably destructive coping strategies, and they've brought 93 00:06:17,160 --> 00:06:20,920 that to school. And the thing is is that if we continue to teach 94 00:06:20,959 --> 00:06:25,439 the way that we've always taught and then we're met with these students, it's 95 00:06:25,519 --> 00:06:30,600 just not connecting how we taught and how they react. It's just not connecting 96 00:06:30,639 --> 00:06:34,160 anymore. And so now we're resenting the kids. It's like a lot of 97 00:06:34,199 --> 00:06:36,399 times we were wondering, why do we even want to be here? If 98 00:06:36,399 --> 00:06:39,639 the kids are going to be this way, If they're going to talk back, 99 00:06:39,680 --> 00:06:42,240 if they're going to get up and walk across the room and talk back 100 00:06:42,279 --> 00:06:44,519 to us when we tell them to sit down, if they're going to go 101 00:06:44,560 --> 00:06:47,000 to the bathroom and vape in the bathroom and trash the bathroom, like why 102 00:06:47,040 --> 00:06:51,000 should we care? Right? And so this is leading to yet another reason 103 00:06:51,240 --> 00:06:55,480 why a lot of us want to quit is that the kids don't even see 104 00:06:55,519 --> 00:06:59,800 the point of trying. They don't see the point of even being at school. 105 00:07:00,079 --> 00:07:02,600 So remember during that year and a half to two years, depending on 106 00:07:02,680 --> 00:07:05,560 what it was like in your state, the kids didn't have any structure, 107 00:07:05,720 --> 00:07:09,920 and a lot of them were just able to do whatever they wanted to do. 108 00:07:10,120 --> 00:07:13,079 I know of quite a few students who would just sign into their class 109 00:07:13,079 --> 00:07:15,120 and then go make themselves a sandwich, and they totally told me about that 110 00:07:15,160 --> 00:07:19,399 too. They admitted that. So the kids had this lack of structure and 111 00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:23,240 then they had to go back to school and go back to all of that 112 00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:26,879 structure, and they were like, I hate this, And that's one of 113 00:07:26,879 --> 00:07:30,240 the reasons why the kids are acting up because they don't want to have to 114 00:07:30,279 --> 00:07:34,079 put up with school students also don't see the point of what we're teaching them. 115 00:07:34,480 --> 00:07:38,600 Before they would just go to school and learn science in English and math 116 00:07:38,639 --> 00:07:41,399 because that's what you're supposed to do. You're supposed to go to school and 117 00:07:41,480 --> 00:07:44,120 learn these things and then, like you know, eventually go to college. 118 00:07:44,160 --> 00:07:46,519 But now the kids are like, I don't see the point of this. 119 00:07:46,680 --> 00:07:48,680 I think this is dumb, and they're very vocal about it. And they 120 00:07:48,720 --> 00:07:55,360 also think that authority is dumb and irrelevant because they know that nothing really bad 121 00:07:55,480 --> 00:07:58,680 is going to happen to them. When you think about it, let's say 122 00:07:58,680 --> 00:08:01,240 that we give them detention. They might skipped attention or they'll go and who 123 00:08:01,279 --> 00:08:05,839 cares. But let's say that they skipped attention. Then what they skipped attention, 124 00:08:05,959 --> 00:08:07,959 and then maybe they get a referral and have to talk to these sistand 125 00:08:09,000 --> 00:08:11,319 principle who just might send them back to class with a lollipop. Let's say 126 00:08:11,319 --> 00:08:16,199 that is escalated to something like a suspension. Now they get to stay at 127 00:08:16,240 --> 00:08:18,439 home. That's kind of a reward for them. What's the worst that's going 128 00:08:18,480 --> 00:08:22,560 to happen to them? Maybe their parents take away their fallen or they get 129 00:08:22,600 --> 00:08:28,600 hassled by their parents, but that's it. They see no consequences for their 130 00:08:28,600 --> 00:08:31,480 behavior. A lot of these kids are at this emotional state, They're at 131 00:08:31,480 --> 00:08:35,000 this tipping point where they just don't see the point in anything. They don't 132 00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:39,919 see the point in trying. So how are we supposed to control them when 133 00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:45,000 they just don't care? And this makes me wonder what is the point? 134 00:08:45,399 --> 00:08:48,879 What is the point of getting an education? And I know that this is 135 00:08:48,919 --> 00:08:50,840 like, of course, Kim, you're supposed to be educated because then you 136 00:08:50,879 --> 00:08:54,240 can be, you know, a good citizen and contribute to society and go 137 00:08:54,320 --> 00:08:58,720 to college. But these kids don't care about that, even the ones who 138 00:08:58,799 --> 00:09:03,200 are about to graduate, they don't care about contributing to society. They see 139 00:09:03,240 --> 00:09:07,720 how stupid adults act, They see how we are when it comes to politics, 140 00:09:07,759 --> 00:09:11,759 and how there's also a lot of times no consequences for adults doing things 141 00:09:11,759 --> 00:09:15,960 that they're not supposed to do, So why should they care. And we 142 00:09:16,039 --> 00:09:20,399 have to stop assuming that they all want to go to college or that college 143 00:09:20,480 --> 00:09:24,840 is even the best solution for them to have a bright future. Think about 144 00:09:24,840 --> 00:09:28,759 it. Look at what's happening with millennials. They have college educations, and 145 00:09:28,799 --> 00:09:31,240 the way that the world is right now, most of them can't even buy 146 00:09:31,240 --> 00:09:35,799 a house. So what our students are seeing, for this gen Z generation 147 00:09:35,919 --> 00:09:39,639 is seeing is that they don't have to go to college and take on this 148 00:09:39,759 --> 00:09:41,559 debt, and a lot of times the people that they know with a college 149 00:09:41,600 --> 00:09:46,480 degree aren't even working in jobs that have anything to do with that degree, 150 00:09:46,600 --> 00:09:48,200 so it was a waste of time and a waste of money. At least 151 00:09:48,240 --> 00:09:50,919 that's what they see. Which gen Z wants to do, is they want 152 00:09:52,159 --> 00:09:54,960 the easy way. They want to become entrepreneurs, which right now there's so 153 00:09:56,039 --> 00:10:00,399 much information online that they probably could do that successfully, or just want to 154 00:10:00,399 --> 00:10:05,200 become influencers and exploit themselves and show up all of their private lives on the 155 00:10:05,240 --> 00:10:09,600 internet. So we have students with this mentality and we expect compliance from them, 156 00:10:09,720 --> 00:10:13,080 and you Guys, you and I both know this. We're not getting 157 00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:18,480 that and it's really really frustrating. So what's the solution. I know when 158 00:10:18,480 --> 00:10:24,200 you're saying just quit teaching, Okay, yeah, I said it. You 159 00:10:24,200 --> 00:10:30,000 could quit teaching. The alternative is to do something different that isn't quitting. 160 00:10:30,039 --> 00:10:33,320 So the last two times that I felt this way in terms of being frustrated 161 00:10:33,360 --> 00:10:37,120 with teaching and ready to quit, I did two pretty drastic things. The 162 00:10:37,200 --> 00:10:41,159 first time, I was teaching band and I decided to switch over to English 163 00:10:41,200 --> 00:10:43,840 because I wanted something different. I was so fed up with the way that 164 00:10:43,879 --> 00:10:48,679 it was in terms of teaching band and having to always fight for students because 165 00:10:48,720 --> 00:10:52,440 I was just an elective, I wasn't getting full classes, so I switched 166 00:10:52,480 --> 00:10:56,240 over to English. The second time that I got really frustrated and I started 167 00:10:56,240 --> 00:11:03,559 to become this mean, snarky, sarcastic teacher who is just always mad at 168 00:11:03,600 --> 00:11:07,080 the world. I switch schools. Now here's the thing. I don't want 169 00:11:07,080 --> 00:11:11,080 to switch schools. I love my school right now. I love where I'm 170 00:11:11,120 --> 00:11:13,399 at. I love a lot of the people there. I'm not going to 171 00:11:13,480 --> 00:11:16,080 lie and say that I love everyone there, but I love a lot of 172 00:11:16,120 --> 00:11:20,360 the people there, not necessarily you know all of my administration, but I 173 00:11:20,399 --> 00:11:24,519 love most of the people there. But doing those two things for you, 174 00:11:24,559 --> 00:11:26,639 guys, if you can you wrap your brains around it, and it sounds 175 00:11:26,639 --> 00:11:31,759 like a good idea, Switching schools and switching subjects would be amazing options for 176 00:11:31,840 --> 00:11:35,919 you. Another thing that I could do is change the way that I teach. 177 00:11:35,200 --> 00:11:41,120 So I used to just do a lot of lecturing and students filling out 178 00:11:41,120 --> 00:11:46,000 worksheets and students taking notes. I don't do it that way as much anymore, 179 00:11:46,039 --> 00:11:48,480 although I do still do some lecture, but the lectures aren't as long. 180 00:11:48,559 --> 00:11:52,600 But now I'm wondering, maybe I need to change things up. I 181 00:11:52,639 --> 00:11:56,279 know that a lot of other teachers that are having problems with students staying focused 182 00:11:56,320 --> 00:12:01,759 and with students participating and not causing trouble, they're going to need to change 183 00:12:01,799 --> 00:12:05,600 up the way that they teach because what they were doing before, or the 184 00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:09,840 way that they've always done is not working. That's not holding the attention and 185 00:12:09,000 --> 00:12:13,519 interests of these students, and that's why they're acting up. And it doesn't 186 00:12:13,559 --> 00:12:16,639 mean that you have to become like an entertainer. It doesn't mean that you 187 00:12:16,720 --> 00:12:18,879 have to do a dog and pony show. But what it does mean is 188 00:12:18,919 --> 00:12:24,200 that you have to teach with the intent of not just delivering information but also 189 00:12:24,559 --> 00:12:28,919 being engaging. But I'm also wondering about how and what I teach. I'm 190 00:12:28,919 --> 00:12:35,440 really considering that I need to rethink that I've always done the same stories and 191 00:12:35,480 --> 00:12:39,759 the same lessons and the same projects and all of that for quite some time, 192 00:12:39,919 --> 00:12:43,000 and I'm wondering if that's effective anymore. And I'm wondering if that's also 193 00:12:43,080 --> 00:12:46,120 part of the reason why I just don't love teaching as much as I used 194 00:12:46,120 --> 00:12:50,399 to, because I'm just kind of going on automatic and I'm just kind of 195 00:12:50,440 --> 00:12:56,519 going on autopilot. I've been really considering about teaching writing in a way that 196 00:12:56,799 --> 00:13:00,360 is useful for the students that will prepare them for the futures. So this 197 00:13:00,399 --> 00:13:05,759 does mean teaching them how to be content creators. Someday they might have blogs 198 00:13:05,919 --> 00:13:09,919 or YouTube channels, and just teaching them how to communicate better and most likely 199 00:13:09,960 --> 00:13:13,080 they're going to be using AI, so also teaching them how to use something 200 00:13:13,120 --> 00:13:16,879 like chat GPT in a productive way, not so that they can cheat, 201 00:13:16,960 --> 00:13:22,480 but so that they can also be better communicators. Considering what the future is 202 00:13:22,480 --> 00:13:24,639 going to be like for them. I'm not saying that it's not valid to 203 00:13:24,639 --> 00:13:31,759 do something like teach them poetry or analyzing reading and passages and grammar and things 204 00:13:31,759 --> 00:13:35,240 like that, framing in a way that will make it meaningful to them, 205 00:13:35,320 --> 00:13:39,080 and not just you're learning this because you're supposed to understand this, not just 206 00:13:39,159 --> 00:13:43,399 teaching them the Pythagorean theorem because that's what everyone has always done, but showing 207 00:13:43,440 --> 00:13:48,679 them why it's useful to them, because now they're wondering what's the point of 208 00:13:48,720 --> 00:13:50,320 all of this, And it's kind of up to us at this point. 209 00:13:50,399 --> 00:13:54,399 If we really want compliance, if we really want them to participate and engage 210 00:13:54,559 --> 00:13:58,080 and not be troublemakers, we have to show them the point of all of 211 00:13:58,080 --> 00:14:03,919 the snow we do. We have to rethink education in a big way because 212 00:14:03,919 --> 00:14:07,159 the kids are different, and they're going to be different. Until the kids 213 00:14:07,200 --> 00:14:13,480 that started in kindergarten during the pandemic have graduated through that's a long time. 214 00:14:13,679 --> 00:14:16,480 Are you going to be able to survive that long if you keep teaching the 215 00:14:16,519 --> 00:14:18,919 way that you've always done, or if you're teaching the way that you were 216 00:14:20,039 --> 00:14:22,440 taught? So am I going to quit. No, I want to, 217 00:14:24,039 --> 00:14:28,080 but I'm not going to quit. I'm just going to reconsider what I'm doing 218 00:14:28,120 --> 00:14:31,039 next year. I'm spending the rest of this time rethinking how I'm going to 219 00:14:31,080 --> 00:14:35,360 approach teaching next year. I'm going to keep my head down. I'm just 220 00:14:35,399 --> 00:14:39,320 going to ignore everyone, Ignore all the emails, stop reading into them. 221 00:14:39,360 --> 00:14:43,279 I'm going to stop replying with snarky responses just so I can have my say 222 00:14:43,279 --> 00:14:46,799 and have the last word. I'm done with that. I'm done with the 223 00:14:46,879 --> 00:14:50,120 negativity because it doesn't matter, doesn't change anything, and it definitely doesn't make 224 00:14:50,159 --> 00:14:54,320 me feel better. So that's my plan for right now, is just to 225 00:14:54,399 --> 00:14:58,039 power through through the end of this year and have my reset over the summer. 226 00:14:58,440 --> 00:15:01,799 So I don't know if you guys have experience varience what I described in 227 00:15:01,840 --> 00:15:05,360 today's episode, but if you have, just know I'm here for you. 228 00:15:05,720 --> 00:15:09,080 And if you are thinking about quitting, be sure to check out the two 229 00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:13,240 episodes that I mentioned, the one that's Ten Uncomfortable Truths about quitting teaching and 230 00:15:13,360 --> 00:15:18,200 also five alternatives to quitting teaching, and I'll link those in the show notes 231 00:15:18,200 --> 00:15:20,360 so that you can check those out. Thanks for hanging out with me. 232 00:15:20,519 --> 00:15:24,679 Today you guys, and I will see you next time. Thanks for listening 233 00:15:24,679 --> 00:15:30,519 to the Teachers Need Teachers podcast. Love this episode, head over to Apple 234 00:15:30,559 --> 00:15:33,679 Podcast or Google Play to subscribe, rate and leave a review.