As a well known African proverb says, a child who is not embraced by
his village will burn it down to feel its warmth. This proverb underscores the
essential need for children to feel accepted and valued by their community. This week's
guest philanthropist, former University of Maryland football player and visionary founder of the Pinkett
Foundation, Damien Pinkett, is a prime example of what happens when a child
is embraced by his village. In this episode, Damien and I continue the
conversation surrounding men's mental health, while the Pinkett Foundation is pioneering efforts to provide
resources and support for those in need, particularly within marginalized communities. Or Mutual
Love for nineties R and B and Akaian, Selfish, and so much more.
As I listen to Damien's story, his journey reminded me of a powerful
truth I realized last year. Or true happiness often lies in reconnecting with the
passions we cherished as children. Similar to the other inspiring men we've spoken to
this month, Damien is a member of Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity Incorporated, and
provides insight into the unwavering support he has received from several fraternity brothers throughout his
adult life. Damien's story supports my belief that true value is not found in
material possessions, but in the challenges we overcome and the positive impact we have
on the world. Damien embodies the paradox of a life lived in high definition,
seamlessly transitioning from being the franchise player on the field to a key player
in philanthropy and the medical field, addressing the un finish business of those who
came before him, proving that we can uplift and empower our communities through philanthropy
without needing to be the martyr per usual. This episode will definitely inspire you
and make you laugh. So grab your tea, coffee, or a glass
of wine and let's talk the Tings. Hello everyone, Welcome back to another
episode of Let's Talk the Things, where we discuss personal growth, travel,
music and wellness while encouraging you to live fearlessly and fabulously. I am your
host, Ash and this week we are Talking the Things with philanthropist and the
visionary founder of the Pinkett Foundation, Damien Pinket. Hi, Damien, how
are you? I'm doing? I love that intro? Why? Thank you
very much. You know, I'm trying to put Oprah out of business.
No, thanks so much for coming to talk the things with me. So
when we have guests, I like to start the episode with our listener's favorite
segment to kind of break the ice. And it's called that no sound safe,
which translated to English means that does not sound safe. For in this
case, that doesn't sound like a good idea. Right, So for this
segment, I'm going to read social media post or comments that listeners sent in.
And if you think it sounds crazy or like a little bit concerning,
then you would respond that no sound safe. If you want to try some
patuas or you can just say that doesn't sound like a good idea and explain
why. And then if you agree, same thing, say you agree and
again explain why makes sense? All right? All right? So the first
one, somebody said evil can pretend to be good and kind, but good
and kind people cannot pretend to be evil. So when you see evil behavior
in someone, believe it that is who they really are. I can agree
with that, I can agree with it. I think at the end of
the day, everybody deserves grace and mercy because not everybody's perfect, only person
perfect. I'm a Christian soul. Jesus would be my north stuff for that.
But when you have I guess just evil characteristics and your actions are evil,
you gotta believe what you're seeing and what people are saying. Obviously,
pray for them. We absolutely, absolutely, And I think that a lot
of times, especially if you're a kind hearted person, like you want to
see the best in people. But I think there's a difference between when somebody's
maybe like having a bad day or even a bad week, versus their character.
You know, absolutely, yeah, for sure, I agree with that.
Okay, So the next one, the person said, my god,
some people are just not okay. The person said, I'm a tend but
my hairline holds me back from approaching women that don't sound say oh we got
confident. Man, you can't work. I don't know if they're gonna be
able to see me obviously have a hair full of locks. But you know,
yeah from a ball brothers or follow the challenge brothers. You know,
just have confidence with who you are. Great advice, I agree, I
agree, And this day and age, you know, everyone has something right.
Nobody's perfect, money is perfect, Nobody in this place is perfect.
We're not looking at myself. Everyone has something that the other person may not
like. So yeah, you have to you know, still have confidence absolutely,
and you didn't always have dreads. The Damien I remember had a low
cut, so you know both sides right the waves. Yeah, it's been
in a few years now. Oh my gosh, that's crazy. Wow,
crazy time flies by. Okay, the next one, the person said,
no matter how wrong she is, if she's short, forgive her. After
all, she's just a baby. Oh goodness. Instagram quote a Twitter quote
something for the short Queen's out. Yeah, that's how they try to get
you though. They try to get you with the sweet, innocent Sure you
know it can't harm you, No, watch out for them. Excuse me
as somebody that is standing at five too. I don't know how I feel
about that, Damien. The average hype for women's five five in America,
so you're not too far off. Five two is not that bad, not
too short. Yeah, I like to say, you know, I'm not
that short, but people think I'm very short, and I don't. I
don't know. I guess because I know that I think about it. Most
of my friends are like my height or shorter, so maybe that's why it
seems normal to me. But usually, like if I'm around people that maybe
have always worn heels around and then they see me in like sandals, They're
like, oh my god, like you're so short, and I'm just like,
geez, I'm not that short. You do wear heels, though you
do wear heels, so it's like you can I do. I know you're
gonna lose some inches. Yeah, yeah, no, that's true. But
I still think I kind of agree with you that that know so uns safe
because you can't let the innocence like fool you. You know, absolutely trust
the big button a smile. You can't trust the you know. Just that's
funny. That is hilarious. Okay, the next one. Let's see.
I can't stand when people say you didn't answer my text, but I saw
you on Instagram. I don't care if I was on the news. I'm
gonna reply when I reply. That doesn't sound safe. I'm a big advocate
for healthy communication. Yes, I agree. If sometimes you just got to
tell that person, hey, look, you're not you know, a priority
like that or or not, or you got to take the hint that you're
not somebody's priority. To point of why they aren't you back or anything,
and that's fair too, But I like healthy communication when it comes to you
know, availability, things of that nature. It's like, okay, yeah,
what's going on with Absolutely, And I think a lot of times people
talk about this when it comes to like man and woman or any type of
romantic relationship. But I think it can also go for friendships, right because
you have some friendships where the person is maybe really needy or they think because
they called you and they need you right this moment, that you have the
capacity to be you know, there for them in that moment, and maybe
you don't, you know, but you should still communicate for sure. Absolutely.
I think with friendship is it's a little bit different. I think romantic
relationship because everything is so new in that realm, I think it can be
a little different. I think friendship you kind of understand who this person is
for more than a couple of months. Yeah, you know how they are
or what they would need. And I think platonic friendship, I think in
general you probably have healthier boundaries. So that's you should to that community.
Yeah you should, right, Yeah, No, definitely, Okay, a
couple more somebody said being a baby must be scary. Imagine falling asleep at
home and then waking up in TJ Max. I agree, I agree.
Next time you know your target target I'm like, where do people get these
things? But it's so true. Knocked out. Have you ever like in
the car and like went to sleep and next time you know you're there?
Yes? Yes, Oh my gosh. That happens so often, especially when
you're like super tired mm hmm, you know, or when you're even like
even when I'm traveling. As you know, I travel a lot, and
sometimes I'll be so tired and then i feel like we just took off and
then I'm hearing we're about to land. I'm like so confused. Those those
are the best flights. Those are the best flights. Yes, for sure,
you cannot be able to sleep on flights really as like, okay,
give me the asle see and and I'm knocked out. Okay. Second to
last one, the person said, I dated a man who I knew was
out of my league, but I chose to start a relationship with him anyway.
He eventually lost respect for me and spent most of the relationship trying to
destroy my self esteem. That sounds all bad, not so safe at all
at all? Out of your league? One? What is that? Why
is that a thing? And then why was he destroying or trying to destroy
your self esteem? That means you were of his league in the first place.
Yeah, it's all bad. Yeah, I don't wish that all buddy.
Yeah, and there those are a lot of a lot of good questions
that you asked that. Yeah, it would be I guess would help us
make like a better assessment. Does that mean he doesn't have money? Is
it like a superficial thing? Or its character the type of person he is.
I think those are factors that could really make you do some like introspection.
You know, I've read that question as she thought he was above her.
Oh that's how you read it. Interesting, Yeah, if I was,
if I if I as a man, and if I want to say
I was dating somebody out of my league, people would think like behnest,
Oh, I see what you're saying. Yeah, and then he tried to
destroy her self esteem? Yeah? Yeah, interesting, it's not good.
Yeah, that sounds safe at all. Okay, And then the final one,
someone said, somebody needs to have an in host R and B nights
where we all where we sing all night and have drinks. Yes, and
I would love the host that. Yes. So, oh my gosh,
do you love R and B like I love R and B? Of course,
shout out to my boy baby J. He's doing a wine and slow
jams July thirteenth. Oh, this is getting bigger and bigger every year,
so I'm looking forward to that. Some of my friends from med school are
coming down, so we're gonna have a good time. But the house party
R and B. I would love to host that. I'd be right and
especially like nineties R and B, like you know, Soul for Real,
Candy Rain, that's my favorite song. Stop it right now. Don't let
me test you know, because I will test you on the lyrics. No,
don't test me. I got you because I could, but you know
it was it was a song played yeah in a good part of my life.
Yes, And did you do like dance routines? I did that.
I'm a holy snow Okay, got you. But what about like your friends
like in the neighborhood, You guys didn't do like talent shows in school and
stuff. We were outside riding bikes, jumping on, playing basketball, football.
We were outside we didn't even get on video games until you were like
ten twelve, you know. Oh yeah, yeah, the video games for
sure. But like even though you were outside, not even a little running
man running place. No, there's no music when you run. But that's
true. Yeah, that's true. That's true. Okay, I'll let you
slide. As long as you're on the nineties R and B trained, then
it's safe. That was fun. But now let's really talk the things.
So, as you know, June is men mental health Awareness month, so
I would love it if you could share why you think bringing awareness to men's
mental health is so important. But before we do that, I think it's
important to get to know who you are. So who is Damien Pinkett?
And specifically, I want you to answer without stating your name, what you
do, or where you are from. So who are you without any of
the labels that have been placed upon you? I am first and foremost a
child of God. I am an adultee ah, I am a friend.
I am honest, I'm kind, I'm calm, cool, collected, or
however they say that, I think I'm a pretty chill person in general.
I love that. Love that, And how do you think you being an
adoptee has affected your ability and we'll talk about it a little bit more,
but your ability to and your desire to kind of give back to underserved and
marginalized communities. Absolutely. I think being adopted. I know everybody has their
own story, particularly with adoption, so it's never once I fit all,
it's all. But I believe my story is pretty amazing and it kind of
created who I am as a person. I know love because I'm adopted.
I've seen the love of my parents. I was their choice, right,
so they picked me, and I think that really stuck with me throughout my
life. Granted so much from the Pinkets, it I would be to not
give back. I remember when I first started the Pinkin Foundation, my health
nonprofit. I talked to my dad. He's, oh, I could always
see you doing this, Like when you were young, you used to clean
up parts and you just wanted a safe place and a clean place for your
friends to play. So I get that my parents absolutely. I've just seen
my parents give some back to the community and to their family, the ones
who the family really leans on it in times of trouble, whether people are
passing away as we get older, Yeah, yeah. So I think my
roots are strong in terms of community service, public health because of my parents.
So yeah, I think being a doctor, I know where it could
have been given my my birthing story, which it's interesting I kind of find
out. I found out more a couple of years ago when I turned thirty.
Oh wow, first story. So yeah, it could have went to
went left. I could have had a different life. But why am And
I love the positive way that you look at it, that you were a
choice, right. I don't think I've ever heard anyone look at it or
say it like that, which I think is so beautiful because it's true.
You know, I think a lot of times when people talk about family,
like the go to quote or saying is like, you know, you don't
get to choose your family, but your family chose you. And I think
that's such a beautiful way to look at that. Yeah. And then also
you talked about how your dad mentioned that or said to you or reminded you,
I should say, because you obviously lived it, but that you used
to like to clean up parks and stuff like that, And it just makes
me think of how much like as we get older, especially in our thirties,
it's like you're going back to who you were as a child, and
that's really where like our happiness life. I think that's a very profound statement
because I think it's very true, and I'm getting close and closer to that
every day. It's all right, what made me happy when I was like
ten twelve, even like fourteen fifteen. It's like that childhood in us is
sparking and it's been reinvented. I think in our college years and early twenties,
we were grinding, grinding, grinding. I think now that we're a
little bit more, you know, some of us are more blessed to be
able to reflect a little bit and kind of go back to our root.
That's so true, and you know, it's just it's such a good feeling
because you look back and you realize that you kind of I don't even want
to say lost yourself, because I do believe that you have to go through
things to become who you're destined to be. I think, you know,
there's no such thing as something bad happening to you. I think everything happens
for you. And that's just so that I choose to look at life,
because, like you, I believe in God, and I believe that God
lets everything happen for a reason, even if we don't understand it in the
moment. And I just for me, I know, like I realized you
change as you get older because you're surrounded by people that are telling you no,
right. And when I say no, I don't necessarily mean in the
literal sense. But for example, you know, when you're maybe in I
don't know, third or fourth grade, and somebody asks you what do you
want to be and you say, oh, I want to be an astronaut
and a basketball player and a carpenter. Nobody goes, what the hell,
like you can't be all those things. They're just like, oh my gosh,
yes, that's so great, Oh gosh, tell everyone what you want
to be. But then when you're eighteen and you go to your parents and
you're like, you know what, I'm really good. I'm really good at
painting. Like I really think I could paint. I could be a painter,
and I can study. Your parents or your family or your friends might
be like what you want to paint? Like what the hell are you going
to do with painting? You know? So it's just so interesting how like
being an adult is kind of trying to survive adulthood, but also not lose
who you were as a child when you had so much freedom just to be
yourself, you know. Yep, Yeah, that's a great perspective. Well,
speaking of the foundation, before I get started on that, I should
say back to the first question, why do you think it's important to bring
awareness to men's mental health? I think in general, when it comes to
men's mental health, Black men's mental health specifically, I think it allows us
to be seen a lot of the times in America where typically typecast as people
who hardened or aggressive, but you know that comes from not seeing somebody.
So when it comes to emotional health health, allowing us the latitude to think
and live and breathe and be without judgment, I think it's important. If
we're considered to be leaders of our families and patriarchs of community and that quote
unquote typical you know, strong nuclear family. Yeah, then we have to
be strong all the time. And it seems seems like we don't necessarily have
emotions, but we do. So when it comes to certain things that are
happening in the community with men, suicide happening at higher rates, and things
of that nature, it's because we don't necessarily have the outlet sometimes, So
I think that's why mental health manage. Definitely. And do you think it
has something to do with the fact that black boys are looked at as adults
at a younger age than their counterparts, So it's like they don't really have
such a large span of time to be looked at as like a boy.
Like what makes somebody look at, you know, a five year old black
boy and say, oh my gosh, she's so cute, and then in
five years they're afreed, you know what I mean? Like, do you
think that has something to do with winging on the mental health of particularly black
men. Absolutely, I think we have to grow up a little bit earlier
than other communities. But it kind of just Also I talked about the nuclear
family that it does relate to that in terms of eighty percent of our children
not being born in a two parent household, so you grew up a little
bit earlier. Who's in poverty, it's not the majority, it's black and
brown folks. When you when you're growing up in poverty, you gotta you
gotta work a little harder, you gotta, you know, kind of build
yourself up and to get out of that situation you looked at as a you
know, somebody that needs to help, you know, sooner. Not everybody
the chance to just be boys, you know, yeah, yeah, gotta
get that job, help with the with the family, you know, at
younger rates. But I think there's a lot of things that kids have to
do. Then we're not fully developed as kids, but we're being made to
make adult decisions and it's unfortunate. Back to your foundation, as I mentioned
also in the introduction, you have your own foundation, the Pinkett Foundation,
and you spoke about this a little bit, and it focuses on improving public
health within underrepresentative and underrepresented, sorry and marginalized communities, which I think is
so amazing. And although your foundation supports men and women, focusing on men
for this episode, how do you think intersecting identities such as race, which
we kind of talked about to a little bit, maybe sexuality or disability influence
men's experiences of mental health and their access to get support. Okay, so
when it comes to intersectionality in men in general, first and foremost, we
have to understand that there is intersectionality. I don't think I think sometimes men
are kind of grouped together, especially in black men. My nonprofits for black
and brown people the African diasporas, so that's who I focus. But you
have to think there are people who are mixed race, there are people who
are in the LGBTQIA community, there are people who don't identify as anything,
right, and then we have to think about age and things of that nature.
So you might be talking to nineteen year old about mental health, but
the eighty year old might be dealing with depression as well, right, So
it kind of all needs to be talked about in general. So what I
do with my nonprofit, yes, it's open to everyone, so but being
open to everyone means I got to be open to everyone, right, including
men. So what I do is work with different routs organizations and just try
to have that community engagement. So through different programs that I do, we
just try to make it, you know, as fun as possible where people
can come in and just talk and be themselves. My background is pedietary,
so when I was up in New York and pedietary school, I kind of
learned a lot about foot health. It's all about foot the inkle surgery up
there. But in terms of diabetic patients a lot of our homeless community,
and that's a part of my story as well. My birth mother was on
this, so it's like a lot of things kind of got hide the end
to me without me knowing. People would donate coats every winter, right,
but you only need one heavy coat for the winter. You need a different
pair of socks every day, especially for you talk about your foot, So
we're talking about people who are don't have that access to care. There might
be fissures in their feed or cracks or their their poor wound healing. New
socks are good and they're the least donated item and the most needed item in
different homeless shelters throughout America. I'm in now. So we just did a
drive in the winter for in Ward eight, Ward eight and seven really at
different shelters including New York Avenue Men's Shelter. So just being able to do
that and then posting events on on like physical health of our of our brothers
too. Heart health is a big thing, cholesterol, hyperden stuff, walking
group, things of that nature. So we got physical health, how healthy
are we as people? And then we have to think about the access to
health as well, So definitely do a better job at that as a country
really for sure? For sure. And have you noticed any disparities in mental
health awareness and resources based on factors like race or like you said, socio
economic status. Oh, absolutely, absolutely, I think that's that's kind of
the main thing. You look across any health statistic, Black people in general
are not going to be at the top of those, regardless of race socio
economic status. So that's already a mapped in thing. Right. There was
a study. It was with black women, but regardless of economic status,
black women had a higher maternal mentality rate. I'm actually doing any lie that's
focusing on the work. But and it affects men too, because what happens
when you know, a mother passes away during childbirth? Yeah, the father
of more as a single parent in that regard. So we're helping them raise
diapers for fathers in need as well as families in need as well. So
yeah, it's a it's a big thing. And then we got to think
about say that one more time, I said, and then we have to
think about you know, poverty levels. Black Americans live in a poverty level
more than any other group, almost had two times. Then you have to
think about the prison population. Black people make up fifty percent of the prison
population. There's over forty percent of people in the foster care system. So,
and these are just all things that have to do with me. My
mother was my birth mother. She was in the DC jail. So these
are some things that I've had a passion without knowing the birth story, right.
But yeah, and I think, you know, it's so interesting to
me how God works, right, Like, you didn't even know you were
on a path that had so much to do with you know, your birth
story. And I think, like like I said, as we get older,
we realized that everything that we thought in life was a mistake or why
did this happen? Or maybe I should have done something else. You come
to realize you were on the right path all along, even if you didn't
know it, you know. Yeah, So I think that's that's so beautiful
that you found that out a couple of years ago when you got more information
on your birth story and you started to connect the dots. And it must
be such a good feeling knowing that it sounds like you're right where you're supposed
to be. Yeah. I like that perspective too. That for sure,
when I first moved to New York where I lived at Column I would go
to the door and they would have everything locked up. Then I went to
a different stores a Dwayne Read I believe in like the Upper east Side,
nothing was locked up at all. So it's like, all right, how
are we living? How are we being perceived to it? And it's like
does that take a toll? I know it takes a toll on our mental
health. I gotta I gotta all somebody so I can get this deodorant,
Like, how do you how's that gonna make me? You know, growing
up versus being able to freely go in and yeah, So it's very commoluted.
It's very convoluted. Yeah, because if you think about it, that
that's gonna tell let's say a young boy that whoever owns this store doesn't trust
him. You know, that's how it's gonna be received. And that has
to affect the mental health of young men, particularly young black men. And
it's interesting because being from somewhere like Jamaica, our motto is out of many
one people. There's a lot of persons of different races in the country.
You know, in my family, I grew up with persons of Chinese,
Indian descent, white whatever. However, the majority of the country is of
African descent, right, so business owners are women, black women, black
men. The other day, I saw this young black boy that opened up
his own school in his neighborhood. He was helping kids with homework and he
just started his own school to help, you know, kids that don't have
access to certain things. And so it's not until I got older, and
by older I mean probably like two or three years ago, that I realized
how positively that's affected me and my family members that are my age that we
saw that growing up, So it wasn't so odd to see like, oh,
there's a black person that's the CEO of this company, okay, And
it makes me think, no, what that does to your psyche growing up
not seeing that, you know what I mean, Like, I never really
thought about it before, but now I'm realizing, Like, don't get me
wrong, everywhere has its problems, and even though that is the case,
there's still problems in Jamaica, right. But I think just when you talk
about that store situation and things being locked up and to get a deodorant you
have to ask for a key. It's just like It's making me think what
does that do to a young person's mind, Like, what message does that
send to them? It definitely sends a message of I have to ask,
I gotta need I need permission to do this. When I was around my
friends in college, they were just like, just do it, like,
oh I can. I don't need to ask somebody to be able to do
certain certain things, you know. So, yeah, I think it does
something. It does something. Can I quantify or qualify it? I don't
know. I think that'd be a great study to look at for sure,
if it hasn't already been done right right, No, definitely definitely. And
you mentioned college and I had Oz, who's your fraternity brother. I had
him on here and we were talking about how, you know, in college,
you go to this place and you're surrounded by so many different types of
people, Right, how did you use your brotherhood to kind of help with
your mental health? Because when you're in college, you're not just there to
study, right, Like, you're going through trying to figure out what you
want to do in life and also have a social life. So how do
you think that being part of that brotherhood positively affected your mental health? I
think It's great first foremost out File fraternity incorporated with the first black Greek letter
organization ever in a in collegiate setting found at Cornell, you know, Ivy
League school that we weren't allowed to be another fraternity, so we you know,
started our own, particularly at the University of Maryland College Park, the
Iotazeta chapter. I think just being surrounded by people who thought like me and
had had a vision for life like me too. I crossed when I was
seventeen, so I was young. I couldn't vote. There was a discrepancy
because there was everybody in Alpha has to be able to vote. I wasn't
holding though. We had a question around two thousand and ten when when I
was going through if I if I could finish or not. But you know,
they allowed me to because there was certain historical members like doctor Martin Luther
King, who was of a younger age too when he became an Alpha.
Oh wohoa, so you're in good company. I'm a great company. But
yeah, so just being around the brothers and some of my best friends,
you know, growing up, like I said, I was seventeen, I
was the baby still, you know, Oh my gosh, I can't believe
you were seventeen. That's crazy. Yeah yeah, wow wow wow wow.
No, that's that's amazing. And is there or can you think of a
time and maybe it was recently or maybe back when you were in school,
was there a particular brother who supported you and gave you guidance like when you
really needed it the most, Because we talked about how you know, it's
not just while you're in school, but OZ even talked about the brother from
like nineteen ninety five that reached out to him and still reaches out to him
to check to see how he's doing, which I think is so amazing.
Yeah. Absolutely so. When I first got to campus, Mark Conway,
who is a city council member in Baltimore City now, which is awesome.
Need to see him thrive politically. He was president of the NAACP chapter at
University of Maryland. So he's somebody who I've always held close. My dean
Eric Brady, he's a lawyer. He's always looking out and checking in with
me. I got some brother eighties Byron, awesome brother. He played football
at Maryland and for the Miami Dolphins. I played football at Maryland, so
there's a connection there as well. Doctor Hector, not doctor Melvin Ego,
Joseph Thomas, all those people always giving me advice in terms of medicine.
And I got some younger brothers who are in medicine as well, whether it's
dentistry or internal medicine that nature. But yeah, we got people from over
dj he's a Somali a like one of my best friends, Maurice. He's
going to law school. So we keep each other. Just we reached back
and we reach up. And Rohan Rasheen like, yeah, these are some
great brothers. Yeah, Reggie, I've so many of the name, but
I think all of them always looked out for me, especially older brothers because
I was young. I always going to have them as big brothers. And
the people who crossed after me, some of them are older than me,
even though I crossed maybe like three, four or five years before them,
maybe born in the same year because you were so young. Yeah, so
I have I have that perspective and access to a lot of people in generations
really love. I think, yeah, they always if I need a question,
I talked to like Micah, like my line brother, he's just got
his d D last year, Like Joshua Paris has seen mo Nick like just
doing it beautiful. It's definitely amazing. All right. So for our last
segment, I'm going to ask you. I'm gonna honor the jewels and ask
you seven questions. Okay, So they're gonna be like quick questions, meaning
you don't have to give long responses. So you can give one word or
you can give a sentence. And I only say that because I don't want
people to feel like they have to give detailed responses. But if you want
to, you can feel free to do. So, okay, I'm gonna
give us some detailed responses. Okay, no problem, it's this is your
episode, so whatever you want to do, it's fine by me. Okay.
So okay, so the first question, what does happiness mean to you?
Happiness? Happiness means to me the state of being content. And I
say that in a way that's biblically sound. So a lot of people know
Philippians for thirteen, I can do all things through crisis strengthens me. That's
one of my favorite Bible verses. A lot of people don't understand that the
context I told you'all weren't gonna be short. No, that's fine, it's
your world. You know, I'm just here. That's fine. A lot
of people don't understand the context of that that chapter is. It talks about
contentment really like if God a lot, if God gives me a little,
what can I do with that? And will I be happy with either?
Or so, if I only have X amount of things in my life,
cannot be happy with that. If I have X times x amount of things
in my life, cannot be happy with that. I think that's what means.
Am I content? Or can I be content? I love that in
the state of currently obviously, I think ambition is great and you're wanting to
do more and give more. I think that's amazing. Can I be content
where I am right now? I love that. I think that's how beautiful
answer. Okay, next question, If you could have dinner with anyone living
or deceased, who would you choose? And why? Just one person?
Just one person is the one person you have to choose, So make a
good choice. Oh, my my grandfather comes to mind, Richard allen Brand.
Yeah, he passed away when I was in college, and unfortunately I
missed his funeral. And like I said, I was young in college.
So I think now at this time. I would love to just have a
conversation with him and pick his mind. He's also my fraternity brother as well.
Oh wow, yeah we didn't. We didn't get a chance to really
talk about that as he was older when he passed. But his wife,
my grandmother, she's still with us. She's ninety four, so what Yeah,
she talked about him every day. She misses him. So yeah,
I would love to sit down conversation with I call him pop Pop. I
love that amazing. Okay. Next question, it's also, as you know,
Caribbean American Heritage Month, so I have to ask, what is your
favorite Caribbean food? I said Caribbean, but I really wanted to say Jamaican,
but I'm trying to be increasing. You know you heard I can't sell
fish, but damn man, I'm impressed. You know the teaing's them there,
Damion sewfish is my favorite food of all time. Like, I would
eat it all day every day if I could see then yes, you did
it. That was the right answer. Mm hmmm, I'm just yeah.
Okay. Next question, what is your favorite food pairing with wine? Mm?
Okay, so I like wine. I hope my best friend DJ,
who is the Somalia. I talked about food Cabernet like red cats. I'm
a player with a with a medium steak. If I'm doing a white wine,
sam block is my favorite, I'm gonna do some type of fish.
Salmon's the easy answer, the same as what if you never had like a
red blend with like pizza. It's great, interesting, it's good. So
I will tell you My alcohol tolerance is in the basement. I have a
very low tolerance for any type of alcohol. However, I have no you
know what. I don't like beer. I think it tastes very bitter.
I'm more of a rare nephew kind of woman. But it's literally like one
drink and I'm done. That's it. I could give you some pounds so
you can be you know, have a higher tolerance, but no. So
here's the thing. I was never really into wine like that. Like I
was just the person that I have wine when I go out for like a
birthday dinner or something, and I just order whatever is like not too sweet
but not too dry. Right. But then I had my lovely guest who
is now a friend of mine, Bannery, who is the public relations the
director of public relations I'm sorry for wine enthusiasts. I had her as a
guest earlier this year, and she invited me to sip Off South America and
there were like seventy vendors and you had to like go around and do tastings.
And I was so nervous because I thought I was gonna drop down because
after like two tastings, I already felt the room was like tilting, you
know. But it was so it was so like interesting and it was so
fun and to see how you know, people are so into wines and they
know these things and they know, like the guy's telling me, oh,
this is from this climate, and I'm like, sounds great, sir,
but I'll just take some of the whites. I don't know what you're talking
about, but I'm just gonna smile and pretend, you know. But it's
so like, I think it's great. Like for example, what you mentioned
what DJ does and you know him being like a black man. She was
even telling me, you don't see a lot of that, you know.
So I think that's so amazing that even in that setting, I saw a
good amount of black and brown people and they were so knowledgeable about these wines
and like you know, the guy saying, oh, well, you might
taste this in this and I'm just thinking, oh, this tastes good,
you know, just on like a very basic level. But being around her
and her putting me in that environment really opened my eyes to like wine pairings.
And we were even talking about wine pairings with Caribbean food, you know,
and that being something that persons don't really talk about as much. I've
seen a lot on like Indian food and like you said, maybe pizza and
fried chicken, but I don't really see a lot when it comes to Caribbean
food. So she sent me some articles and I even had a sponsorship from
the McBride sisters and paired it with like some escavich fish. And yeah,
so I am not DJ. I'm not quite there, but yeah, I'm
building up my tolerance. Trying to take it from the basement is amazing.
Okay, three more questions. The next question is if you want an all
expense paid luxury vacation on a yacht. I'm talking like Big jay Z,
big pimpin yacht, although we don't condone pimping, but you know what I
mean, big yacht right throughout the Caribbean, and you can only bring.
You can only bring Damien. Five people? Who are you bringing? Hum?
Five people? I have a only five special lady in my life.
She's coming, Okay, Okay, I'm just glad you said her first.
I just wanted to put that all there. I'm just glad you said her
first. Five people. Hm hmmm. I would bring my parents too,
okay, okay, so that's three parents, Aaron Jackson, who was my
best man, that's my we call we call each other cousins. But okay,
but that's like family, and his wife I'll bring Okay, okay,
nice. Nice. Normally people panic, but you did pretty good. You
seem like you had it. You know, you thought it all really quickly.
So that's good. I had. I had a picture where we're going.
We're going to church, We're going to Haiti. Yeah. I love
that. Love that. Okay. So I tried this new thing, and
I'm going to see how long it lies asked. But I'm allowing my guests
to ask me anything they want to ask me, since you don't get to
ask any question. Okay, how many questions do I do? I did
five or six? This would be the sixth one, So you have one
more after this question. Okay, what is your biggest inspiration that speaks to
your purpose? Mmm, I would have to say the what would be a
quote, but the who would be who the quote is from. Does that
make sense? That can't be who? You gotta be what I need to
hear. Okay, so I'll stick with the what. Then I'll stick with
the what. So the what is a quote that my Well, it's not
a quote something that my grandmother said to me all the time before she passed
away, for my entire life. You can you Yeah, that's true.
I'll give it. I'll say that is a quote and it's don't let anyone
take your freedom, and it really supports who I am and it really was
the foundation for me even starting this podcast. So that's funny that you asked
me that. I think that when I was younger, I didn't quite know
what she meant. Like, when I was really really young, I used
to think she meant it in a literal sense, and I would just think,
oh, gosh, like I'm free, grandma, Like no one's gonna
take me. Like I'm like, I'm a free person. I can move
around, you know. But then as I got older, like let's say
when I went to college, she would say, you know, don't get
into any arguments with friends or over a guy or anything like that, because
you don't want them to take your literal freedom, meaning to get you into
a situation where you could go to or you know, you could get hurt.
But most importantly, as I got older, she reminded me not to
let anyone take my mental freedom. And I think that's the most important because
when you are a kind person, you tend to project your kindness onto other
people. And a lot of times you can put yourself in a situation where
you see that this person or this situation is not good. Right, Like
you see that someone or some job or something is showing you like this is
not good. But you think, well, if they just could you know,
know this, or get this piece of information or feel this love,
that maybe that could change, you know. And what you don't realize is
that takes away your peace right, which is essentially part of your freedom.
And it always makes me feel really proud that throughout any thing that I've been
through, I've always leaned on that and I've never allowed anyone to take away
my peace of mind. And I think that by doing this podcast, and
people have told me that, which really warms my heart. That it gives
people an outlet to kind of talk about themselves, talk through things, you
know, and not alone in life and like stuff that they go through,
which means a lot to me. So I know that's kind of like a
roundabout way of answering it, but hopefully that answered your question. I identify
with that quote so much, both in the literal sense and the figurative says,
like, for me, a big thing that I always aligned with is
I can't have anybody lying on my name. I'm so like, no,
don't do that, Don't say I did something I didn't do. Don't accuse
me of something. That's like one of the biggest pet pies for me.
But in terms of literal freedom too, if we're talking about mental health,
being black in America, being a black man in America, it doesn't matter
how much money you have, you're going to be considered a black man period,
right, Absolutely, No one in ten black men are going to be
incarcerated by the time they're thirty two. Like that's a lot of people.
Yeah, And that was one thing I said, I never want to go
to jail, you know, especially for something I did not do literal freedom,
but also, yeah, don't take my mind. Yeah, I want
to be able to think. I want to be able to move how I
want to move and honor the people who want to going to honor. So
I love that if you think about it, and my mom actually says this
all the time, your mind is so important because it's with you twenty four
to seven. It's the only thing that with you, like all the time,
you know. And so I remember being younger and being like, you
know, I'm I'm doing good in school, Like you should be happy I'm
not out there doing bad things. And my mom would be like, that's
what you're supposed to do. You're not doing me any favors because if you
do something wrong or you do something quote unquote bad, you have to live
with that, not me. And at the time I was just thinking like,
well, that didn't go over how I thought it was supposed to go.
But like as I got older, I thought like, she's so right.
You know, when you do something in life and you think I was
telling this to somebody the other day, People do things and think that they're
getting away with it, right. But there's a saying in Jamaica. God
doesn't sleep right. So you might think you're getting away with it, or
you might think you can do something really bad and you know you got away
with it like nobody saw it, or you know, you won the lottery
the next time day, or you got that job you always wanted and you
thought, well, you know what, I did that, but whatever,
like I'm moving on, it happened. But trust me, eventually you will
reap what you saw, and that can be in many different ways. And
you can't do things in life and just think that you can live, you
know, freely and you don't have to. I guess I don't want to
say pay because that sounds a little rough, but like you, you can't
do things to others and not reap what you saw, yep, you know.
And I just think that's really it's really important for just everyone to remember
to not let anyone take your peace of mind. It's literally all that you
have. And I think until you have gone through something where it's been taken
from you or tried to be taken, you don't really realize how valuable it
is. Right because if you've never been through anything that has attempted to take
your freedom, then you think, oh please, like you know, nobody
can take my freedom from me, or no one can say anything to me
or whatever until you're in it, and then you're like, oh my god,
like how you know, Deborah Cox, how did we get here?
Okay? And the final question, if you could give your eighteen year old
self one piece of advice, and yes, Damien, just one, what
would you say? Oh man eighteen so, oh gosh eighteen. I was
a sophomore in college. I was on the football team. I had pledged
our Yeah. The first thing that comes to mind is don't do it.
Oh my god, it okay, do it? Like I was happy with
who I was in my path, especially like living for God, so I
would I would have say don't do it. But obviously life, life,
and everything happens for a reason. So I think I wouldn't be who I
am today if I didn't do some of the things that I did. But
I would just say, you know, keep God first, So that I
think that would be the one. Keep God first and everything I do,
don't stray away from Him, lean not on my own understanding, in all
my ways, acknowledge Him would be the advice I would give to that eighteen
year old version of me who I felt like from you know, going to
church. I fell away from the Bible at that particular time in INSIGHT's gonna
be twenty So yeah, I wasn't even thinking, you know, about God
and my relationship which Jesus that at eighteen, Yeah, eighteen sophomore year.
Yeah, man, madness and badness combination. But you know what, like
you said, that had to happen, right, because if that didn't happen,
you wouldn't have had the epiphany like, okay, wait, I need
to like run it back, you know. M hm. So not a
mistake, just a lesson. I was gonna do the jay Z quote,
but it just came away from me. I have to get better at these
rap lyrics. I didn't need to college either. I was a little late
to jay Z, but you know, I just used for my launch or
or for the event I'm doing the Castle nice. Well, if you need
somebody to step in as a rapper, I am available. Right, We're
gonna have some some different music. There's something gonna be some instrumentals maybe that
you can rap. Okay, you know it's gonna it's gonna sound a little
like the Queen's English. But I will do my best not to embarrass you.
I promise you good. You're good. Well, Damien, I'm so
sad. But that concludes the episode, and I want to thank you again
for coming to talk the things with me. And I think that the work
that you do for underserved and marginalized communities or just in general is admirable and
inspiring. Problem thank you for having me. I'm definitely honored that you even
thought about me. Of course, the health, equality, those are kind
of the things that I focus on, and I think that's kind of my
life purpose in terms of being a voice for the people who don't have one.
I love that. I love that. And before we go, is
there anything that you want to share with the audience, perhaps any events that
you have coming up, or where they can find your foundation or donate or
anything like that. Yeah. So the pink and Foundation dot org is the
website, The Pinkinfoundation dot org. Backslash donate is how you can donate.
I'm on I guess zel at info at the Pinkin Foundation dot org for donations,
but Instagram you will find me at the Pinkin Foundation. So it's pink
Foundation everything it's not a lot of pinkets. We're all related. Uh so
that's cool. But the big thing that's happening is we're doing an event actually
on my birthday, July nineteenth, down at the It's my birthday. It's
gonna be fun Smith Center Healing for the Arts. They're they're really doing it
in the community. And I found this organization via an artist. He goes
by kid and Noble on Instagram, and it was during Women's History Month where
he was a photography so photographer. So we had a gallery of just black
women all over the place. So I fell in love with the space.
I fell in love with Ms Lisa over there, who is the executive director,
and I was like, yeah, we have to work together. So
July nineteenth, it's called a Night at the Art exhibit. An artist,
a local artist named Courtney. She's gonna have her work up. We're gonna
have jazz there, We're gonna have dj there, j candle making, and
just a chance for philanthropy as well to raise some money for the center and
returnal mentality and collecting diapers. So it's free. It is a free thing
for everybody, but I am asking that people do bring diapers so we can
give to people in DC who need it. So it's gonna be good,
it's gonna be fun. I'm getting a little sponsorship, so I just got
one to email that right before this, I got one from Coca Cola's gonna
be sponsoring. Oh that's amazing, thank you. Gallo a wine company.
They're gonna be sponsoring some wines as well. So if you know uh in
Cua Champaign, that's be a gallow. If you know a pothic, that's
gallow. If you know barefoot, that's gallow. So they're gonna be donating
some wines. So it's gonna be a good night. It's gonna be my
better be a good night. You know it has to be. And look
how selfless he is. Ladies and gentlemen. You're having an event like that
on your birthday. That's amazing. Thank you,