WEBVTT

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Hey everyone, and welcome too.
Parenting beyond the headlines. I'm Sarah Cody

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on the East Coast along with my
friend Amy Alamar who's all the way over

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on the West coast. Amy,
we are balancing the pandemic in our own

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ways from different sides of the country, and I got to say getting old.

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But luckily we are joined here today
by Stephanie Rondo, who's an athletic

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trainer and wellness coach, and I
am hoping that she can give us some

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tips on kind of keeping our sanity, keeping our wellness and checks. So

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Stephanie, thank you for joining us. Welcome, Thank you so much.

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I'm so happy to be here today. You know, Stephanie, I'm a

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journalist. I've done a lot of
stories about supporting kids during this time,

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which is extremely important teens. But
an expert recently said to me, we

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also have to focus on parent self
care because if the parent doesn't fill their

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own bucket during this tough time,
they're not going to be able to help

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their family fill their buckets either.
So let's just dive into that topic.

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Are you seeing in your wellness career? Are you seeing parents sort of struggle

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to make time for themselves to practice
that necessary self care. Yeah, so

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this is a really big issue right
now, not only in terms of my

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clients, but also in terms of
you know, I'm in a mom's group

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for each of my children, one
who's seventeen months old and one who's four,

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and moms of you know, kids
of both these ages. Everyone that

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I know is really having a hard
time making time for themselves, Struggling a

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lot with mental health. They're feeling
a lot of this burden of you know,

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juggling child's care, school, and
then also work and finding time for

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themselves. You know, possibly they're
really ship with their partner and then figuring

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out how that all comes together.
And it's like there's not enough time in

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anyone's day right now, and you
know, there are certain things that get

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left off the to do list,
and those, unfortunately usually end up being

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the self care items. So it's
I think a really really common struggle right

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now. And I hear you,
and it does seem like there's not enough

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time in the day, and then
some days seem to just go on forever,

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even if we are busy, I
feel like there's so much time that

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we're desperate to fill, right like
that that's the age old saying about parents

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in general, right, that the
days are long and the years are fast,

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you know what I mean, Like
we do. I'm here at the

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house during the pandemic, maybe,
but I don't know about you. I

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feel I have teen boys, Stephanie, so we're going through food like crazy,

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Like I am eating that kitchen and
cooking that food like nobody's business.

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Grocery shopping all the time. Like
at the house is dirtier because we're here,

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because I'm cleaning all the time.
So I don't know. Even though

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I'm here more, I don't feel
like life is easier. No, definitely

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not easier. Noah, yeah,
absolutely. And I actually read there was

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a quote. There was a There's
been so many articles about this lately that

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I've read. There was one that
there was a quote from a mom that

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really stuck out to me, and
she said something along the lines of,

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you know, some days go by
so fast that I'm not even sure that

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they happened. And I think that, you know, I feel that,

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and I know other moms that feel
that. You know, you get through

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a twenty four hour period and you
think I did all this stuff right.

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I never stopped moving I never sat
down and just thought for a second.

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But I still don't know what happened
today, you know what I mean,

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It just disappears. It's the lack
of structure too. Like, so I've

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been working on Mondays and Tuesdays from
home, but I went into the office

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last week because I'm working on this
giant project and I got sort of sucked

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into the giant project and wasn't even
thinking about the kids at home, And

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all of a sudden, like around
one or two, I'm like, jeez,

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the kids are at home virtual learning. I should check in with them.

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Their teens are fine, but I
should take to make sure they eat.

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But then I was like, at
a regular year, I wouldn't have

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to check in with them. They
would just be at school and I would

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just be at work. Like there's
such this lack of structure that's unsettling too,

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right, I think when you don't
have that separation, everything is blending

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together. You know, housework is
blending with work, is blending with childcare,

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is blending with schoolwork. So there's
no step. You know, there's

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no structure, but there's also no
separation at all. Every you know,

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you see these stories of I'm very
fortunate to work outside of the house,

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and I do y. I feel
very strongly that I'm fortunate to be able

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to do that because I'm not having
to juggle work in childcare at the same

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you know, at the same time. But there you see, you know

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these moms right now that are struggling
to be on a work call while cooking

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dinner, while helping their children with
a zoom class, And it's just everything

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is blended together, and how do
you focus on one and do an adequate

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job at one when you're trying to
do them all at the same time all

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day long. It's exhausting. I
did a story a few months ago about

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women's statistics of drinking rising in this
time, and one of the reasons the

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expert gave me was because it's all
blending together, so that glass of wine

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at the end of the day is
more of a separation, like, ah,

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this is a minute for me,
Ah, this is evening. This

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is some sort of a difference.
So yeah, I think you're right,

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so jump into giving us advice,
you know, I mean, I think

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for me, it's been a time
when I have focused on starting you know,

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I think some people are eating more, sitting around more other people are

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jumping into an exercise routine because we
might have more time around the house than

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we would normally. So what do
you suggest to people? Do you suggest

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they begin that that walk that they've
been meaning to take, they they get

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out. The fresh air is important, isn't it. Oh? Yeah,

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fresh air is absolutely important for so
many reasons. You know, it helps

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our health and boosts our mental health
in so many different ways. It can

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even help with you know, hormonal
health and our endocrine system. So fresh

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air is definitely a positive, and
it's there's a lot of pieces to this,

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because yes, it's important that people
can try to find little ways to

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you know, perform self care and
get physical activity in and get some leisure

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and relaxation time and time to kind
of you know, let your mind recharge

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as well as your body recharge.
But it's finding the time to do these

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things and balancing them as well.
So I do want people to feel encouraged

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to get outside and get moving,
But at the same time, you don't

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want to turn that into another added
added stress and added piece of pressure that

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people think, oh my god,
I'm doing all this and now I need

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to go outside and take a walk, like, where am I going to

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find that time? So I think
it really needs to be you know,

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looking at your life and your schedule
right now and whatever little pieces of time

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that you can control. Some really
great things to try are getting outside and

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get moving the fresh air, even
if it's a ten minute walk. You

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know, right now, the sidewalks
around where I live aren't great. And

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my daughter loves to ride her scooter, but she can't really ride her scooter

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in the snow. So her and
I have been walking up and down just

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our street, you know, down
to the bottom and back and it's not

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a lot, takes maybe ten minutes, but it's something and it gets us

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both some fresh air. And so
I think, you know, thinking about

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little kind of micro you know,
microactivities like that where it doesn't have to

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be a huge time commitment every single
time. And then there are also things

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like meditation. I think that that
can be something that's really helpful for a

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lot of people, whether it's a
structured formal meditation you know, using an

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app, or whether it's just something
where you sit and focus on your breathing

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for five minutes, you know,
and you can speaking of those microactivities,

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you can do that in very small
amounts of time, a few minutes at

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a time. If you have a
little bit of you know, a tiny

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bit of quiet time throughout your day, that can be very helpful. And

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I think another big thing that that
can really be helpful, especially for mental

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health during this time and wellness,
is looking at activities and hobbies that give

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you joy. So if it's something
that you've loved in the past, maybe

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knitting, or maybe it's just you
know, reading, or maybe it's writing

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something yourself, you know, finding
little bits of time that you can kind

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of work on those things to feel
like you're making some sort of progress for

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yourself outside of just the go,
go go, you know, the grind

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of your day. That's what I
would love to learn more about to get

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your opinion on. You know,
my my youngest really likes team sports,

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and so getting out and moving is
not something you know, that that he's

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keen to do. You know,
he'll certainly play along if we do it.

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We ended up ordering spike Ball to
get ourselves out and we have the

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luxury, yes, and we have
the luxury of outdoor you know, all

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year round, which is nice.
But I'd love more strategies on getting the

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family moving. Even though we're talking
about sort of self care. I tend

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to go on my runs and you
know, I'll walk with a friend.

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But I feel like, how can
we stimulate that with our kids who aren't

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naturally wanting to get physical. Yeah, I think it can be tough,

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especially if you have kids who aren't
really loving you know, aren't really loving

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the idea, especially as they get
a little bit older and have more independence.

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You know. I think some things
we can encourage are there's always family

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walks that if you have areas around
you that you can kind of explore and

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turn it into more of an adventure
and exploration like a hiding trail or like

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a walk around a pond or you
know, we're really fortunate to live in

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an area where there is a lot
of natural reservation area, so we have

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lots of trails that we can walk
on and stuff and it turns into really

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fun exploration time for the kids.
There are also things like, you know,

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depending on the age of your kids
and how competitive you all are as

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a family, you can always set
up you mentioned spike ball, you can

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do other types of outdoor games,
you know, races again, we race

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up and down our street. I
run and my daughter ride computer and I

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can tell you she's four and she
beats me every time on that s food.

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So you know, things like that
if you don't even if you don't

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call it physical activity and don't call
it exercise, just getting out and getting

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moving. There's some really fun ideas
of people I've seen of people setting up,

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especially if you are able to get
outside right now, extreme hopscotch horses,

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where essentially you take like your whole
driveway or your whole you know,

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the sidewalk in front of you know, your house and in your next door

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aghbor's house, and you set up
all these different stations where you have different

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physical activities and you can vary the
difficulty depending on how old your kids are,

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and make it a fun family competition. You know. I think we're

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a kind of a competitive family,
so that kind of stuff works for us.

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But then also, you know,
just the adventures, the walks,

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the exploring and finding different, you
know, things to feel and smell and

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talk about. Those can be really
helpful too. I think bringing the dog

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along is always fun. And you
know, like you were saying, we're

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lucky to have a lot of places
to hike in Connecticut and you know,

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but lots of states do you can
geocash do things like that. Yeah,

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yeah, I find that online.
It's fun. You know. Another piece

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to please have you touch on is
a part of self care is keeping connections

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too. I mean, I think
women are missing their book clubs, they're

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missing their Wednesday wine night with the
girls, you know, stuff like that.

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So it is important that even if
it's over zoom or a phone call,

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we keep those connections. Yeah,
I agree. I really think that

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connections are especially important right now.
I find that for a lot of people

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because we're so busy and because we're
so we're in this kind of weird limbo

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state right where we don't know exactly
how long this is going to last.

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I feel like some people are kind
of like shrinking into this in our home

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bubble where you don't tend to reach
out as much. And I think it's

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really important for people to keep making
those connections, whether it's over zoom.

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You know, we've we've moved my
book club to zoom and it's been you

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know, it's not the same,
but it's good to chat with people,

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you know, if you have any
place outside where you can get together with

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a couple of friends and stay distance. That's always a great thing too.

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But I think that you know,
as much as you can do on your

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own and with your own family,
there is so much value to connecting with

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other people and really trying to maintain
your relationships because and not only for the

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social factor, but also for the
support factor. You know, you have

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people families that are probably going through
struggles that are very similar to you,

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and it can be really helpful just
to air that out and talk it out

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with someone else sometimes instead of just
kind of, you know, shrinking into

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your own struggles and not having anywhere
to vent it too. Yeah, there

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was an interesting article noting that,
you know, your nuclear family simply doesn't

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take the place of your friendships.
And that's something that we've you know,

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while we've had extra time with our
nuclear family, which is lovely, we

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are missing out on those connections as
well. Am I allowed to get weirdly

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personal? Yes, always, So
you jump back five seven minutes. You

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were talking about finding a hobby,
find something for you, and I had

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this weird idea about a month ago
to get my childhood dollhouse out of the

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attic, which has been in the
attic for somebody's attic for decades pretty much,

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and to do like, you know, a rehab of my dollhouse as

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a pandemic project. And my family
thinks it's the weirdest thing. Like my

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son said to me the other day, Mom, when we said get a

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hobby, this isn't what we meant. But I'm having so much fun paint

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in the whole thing. I'm wallpapering
it, and I look forward to it

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and it's creative. And that was
the kind of thing you were talking about.

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Even if it's a weird, creepy
dollhouse project, if it brings you

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joy in this time, do it
exactly. I love I love that so

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much. I you know, no
matter what, no matter how weird somebody

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else tells you something is exactly,
if it brings you joy, do it

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and own it. You know,
this is the this is the time in

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our lives when we're going to be
able to do that stuff because otherwise we're

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so busy with things out of the
house. So if you find that time

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and you have it, do it. Um. I you know, I

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personally have had a children's book kind
of um you know, blowing around in

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my head for a couple of years
now and I'm now working on it,

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and I'm and I have a draft, and i'm you know, I have

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a manuscript, and i'm you know, shopping around and it's it's just it's

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it's bringing me a lot of joy
just to be working on it, even

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though it hasn't gone anywhere yet.
You know. It's just something to keep

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my mind busy and to you know, give me something to look forward to.

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So things like that are really helpful. I want to have like a

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sassy grandma name, like I want
to be like Mimi or Gig or something.

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So my son was like, what
are you going to do with this

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thing? Mom? And I'm like, I'm gonna save it for your kids

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and Gig will play with them and
it will be like a family story,

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like Gig did this during the pandemic. They're like, but it's been super

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fun. So if everyone can find
their inner dollhouse, you know, I

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recommend it. It's been great.
I like that inner dollhouse. Everyone try

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to find it. Well, tell
us a little bit more about you and

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where people can learn more about you
and catch up with you as we wind

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down here. So again, I'm
a health coach and athletic trainer in the

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Boston area. I work with health
coaching clients. I do a fair amount

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of freelance writing and freelance kind of
presenting. I do some wellness webinar classes

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with Peace at Home Parenting, which
is a Connecticut based company, and I

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mostly the classes that I teach are
are based around parenting where it intersects with

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wellness. And then you can find
me on my own website at Stephanie Rondo

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dot com. You know, we
can. I have a blog that I

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write a lot on there, and
I also write a lot for medium as

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well, a lot in the health
and wellness realm. My passion and my

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biggest thing is really trying to empower
women and help them to find themselves and

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you know, find peace in their
bodies and love themselves and really empower to

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ditch the scale and the you know, societal you know, things that everybody

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wants us to look like and wants
us to do. So, you know,

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that kind of goes into this pandemic
where this is a time again where

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we can start to work on those
things. And so I've found that there

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are a lot of women who are
even though we're busy, and even though

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we're kind of drowning in life right
now, there are a lot of women

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that are really also trying to better
themselves and to kind of find their happy

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play and whether it be working on
fitness or nutrition or just kind of a

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general, you know, wellness state
in their lives. I think this is

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this is something that people are trying
to focus on because they're seeing that,

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you know, things aren't always going
to be perfect, things aren't going to

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be status quo. So I think
I've had a lot of exports stay to

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me in my work in the last
couple of months, like women should love

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themselves in this time and be gentle
on themselves, and you know, our

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best is good enough or whatever the
expression is. You know that trying as

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hard as we can right now is
good enough. It doesn't have to be

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perfect, and we can't be hard
on ourselves about everything. It's too hard

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right now. Anyway. Yeah,
right, Do you have any zoom seminars

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or anything like that coming up that
people could take part in if they were

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feeling this need to center and focus
on wellness. So I do have one.

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I actually just had a wellness talk
on piece at home parenting and that

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was just this past week. Actually, I've one coming up in March.

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It's it's called Wellness on the Run
and it's really just some kind of quick

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tips to help busy parents, you
know, find the different pieces of wellness

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in their life that they can hold
on too. So that I'm actually unsure

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of the date at the moment,
but if you go to peace at Home

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Parenting dot com and look up wellness
on the Run, that is my next

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one coming up. Awesome, Well, thank you so much. That's fantastic

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information. I'm gonna take those tips
personally myself, and thank you for joining

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us today, and thank you listener
for joining us. We're so happy to

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have you with us. Please be
in touch with us at Parenting Beyond the

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Headlines dot com and you can find
us on social media. I met Amy,

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Alamar and Sarah. You're at Sarah
Cody Media. Yeah, you got

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it. Forward to getting any or
all suggestions, pandemic related or otherwise.

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We really appreciate you joining us here
for this time. We hope it was

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helpful and we will spend time with
you again. Take care,