WEBVTT 1 00:00:02.120 --> 00:00:21.280 Comedy Central Podcast. Thank you very much, well, thank you all. 2 00:00:21.839 --> 00:00:25.800 Thank you very much. I' m really glad to be here, but 3 00:00:26.559 --> 00:00:29.160 I' m gonna introduce myself a little bit. My name is Juan Amodeo. 4 00:00:30.480 --> 00:00:32.479 I know I don' t notice much, but just in case I 5 00:00:32.479 --> 00:00:41.479 say it, I' m Andaluz I had to say it because I got 6 00:00:41.479 --> 00:00:45.920 a message from Andalusia and we' re a little tired. We' re 7 00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:52.840 sick and tired of the clichés you have with us You know, we' 8 00:00:52.840 --> 00:00:55.320 re sick and tired of horses. He' s taking her on horseback, 9 00:00:55.439 --> 00:01:00.600 not there I didn' t go out these holidays. So, my mother 10 00:01:00.640 --> 00:01:03.959 applauds me for buleria. No, no, that doesn' t happen. 11 00:01:04.079 --> 00:01:07.840 That' s not what I' m telling you. Like Andaluz, we 12 00:01:08.519 --> 00:01:12.680 are also obliged to be funny, because whenever you go outside Andalusia is typical 13 00:01:12.719 --> 00:01:18.959 of not listening to you speak and say hello Hostia. You' re Andaluz, 14 00:01:19.719 --> 00:01:21.760 you' re Andalou for a cool, huh, for a cool? 15 00:01:22.200 --> 00:01:27.359 You' re andalo say something funny. He tells a joke that says, 16 00:01:27.480 --> 00:01:30.239 " There are people who are andalusia, who are really stupid, don' 17 00:01:30.359 --> 00:01:34.040 t think everyone there is funny" There are no stupid people, really authentic 18 00:01:34.560 --> 00:01:38.120 and there' s a lot of example you can look for. We' 19 00:01:38.239 --> 00:01:41.719 re not all funny. If it' s true that I have an added 20 00:01:41.760 --> 00:01:42.920 pressure, because of course, as an Andalusian, I have to be funny. 21 00:01:42.959 --> 00:01:46.359 But besides, I' m a humorist. So, that already puts 22 00:01:46.359 --> 00:01:49.200 a pressure on you and you have to be ready to tell jokes all the 23 00:01:49.280 --> 00:01:52.319 time. I mean, it' s like all the time. And if 24 00:01:52.359 --> 00:01:56.280 you don' t tell jokes all the time, people get offended and say 25 00:01:56.280 --> 00:01:57.480 uncle this is a lie. No. This I asked for for alienxpres in 26 00:01:57.519 --> 00:02:00.879 one way and it has arrived in another way. It' s not Andalusian 27 00:02:00.879 --> 00:02:09.719 what happened. I' m not here anymore. Thank you this andalou has 28 00:02:09.719 --> 00:02:17.000 arrived defective. But if I tell you it' s a problem, because 29 00:02:17.080 --> 00:02:21.280 many times it creates conflict. No, for example, the other day I 30 00:02:21.319 --> 00:02:23.319 ' m in a bar. This is real. I' m in a 31 00:02:23.360 --> 00:02:28.560 bar and I' m having a beer with a friend and so and there 32 00:02:28.639 --> 00:02:31.000 comes a kid who liked my videos men in fashion you' re from videos 33 00:02:31.199 --> 00:02:34.479 no and men yes, my model, I can take a picture of you 34 00:02:34.520 --> 00:02:36.199 and say man, of course, I take the picture. Not his distance 35 00:02:36.240 --> 00:02:38.400 and everything doesn' t. Maybe he' s in Bosnia and I' 36 00:02:38.400 --> 00:02:40.199 m not here and we take the pictures. Both very well. Thank you 37 00:02:40.199 --> 00:02:46.199 very much. And now comes the demand that I' m mooring. Tell 38 00:02:46.800 --> 00:02:53.919 me uncle I can ask you a favor, tell me, you, you 39 00:02:53.000 --> 00:03:00.000 can tell me a joke that is not now, no, it' s 40 00:03:00.439 --> 00:03:01.560 not the way, no, no, please, Modeo is the time. 41 00:03:01.680 --> 00:03:05.479 No, I really don' t Let' s tell each other a joke 42 00:03:05.639 --> 00:03:07.360 and come here Modeo' s gonna tell a joke I' m really not. 43 00:03:07.520 --> 00:03:09.479 I' m here with my friends and I' m gonna fuck off 44 00:03:09.560 --> 00:03:10.879 this guy who doesn' t joke and he' s going away mad. 45 00:03:14.199 --> 00:03:15.599 You, imagine, we' re going to be polarlo to another profession. 46 00:03:15.680 --> 00:03:22.439 You, imagine this person is a fan of Nacho Vidal and Nacho Vidal is 47 00:03:22.520 --> 00:03:25.039 found man. Nacho how about, Nacho, sung, sung, Nacho, 48 00:03:25.080 --> 00:03:28.000 can take a picture of you with me. Yeah, right, Nacho, 49 00:03:28.520 --> 00:03:36.240 there' s great, Nacho, Nacho, all right, well, Nacho, 50 00:03:38.240 --> 00:03:45.120 Nacho, sorry, Nacho, you, Nacho, you, you, 51 00:03:46.319 --> 00:03:52.599 Nacho, Nacho, Nacho, you, you can me? Nacho, you 52 00:03:52.639 --> 00:04:14.639 can give me a dick here to a boy. It' s not clear 53 00:04:14.639 --> 00:04:15.720 if he asks me to laugh, nacho and you' re going to ask 54 00:04:15.720 --> 00:04:17.959 him. But, well, it' s not just the Andalusians who suffer 55 00:04:17.959 --> 00:04:20.199 from clichés. It suffers from topicality throughout Spain, all over the world. 56 00:04:20.519 --> 00:04:24.680 No. In the end, for example, you want Andalusian, yes, 57 00:04:24.800 --> 00:04:32.920 tell me a joke, that you are from Madrid, yes, well, 58 00:04:33.360 --> 00:04:48.560 give me tap water, no, because uh, not that you are from 59 00:04:48.680 --> 00:04:51.639 Andorra, yes, give it like and subscribe. Please love a bosing. 60 00:04:53.480 --> 00:05:01.160 I don' t know things, not things, things from Andorra. Not 61 00:05:01.639 --> 00:05:04.639 a bossing. Here' s a game, a video game that I see, 62 00:05:05.360 --> 00:05:08.000 I don' t know things. But, well, I think this 63 00:05:08.040 --> 00:05:11.759 whole topic thing is communication issues. I mean, in the end we have 64 00:05:11.839 --> 00:05:15.199 so many social networks, we actually think we know everyone. And it' 65 00:05:15.240 --> 00:05:18.560 s not true that social networks have taken a lot of things away from us, 66 00:05:18.759 --> 00:05:24.480 like linking well now as it is linked on social networks, on Instagram, 67 00:05:24.759 --> 00:05:27.519 hello pretty without h and with w i mean Before it was a nicer 68 00:05:27.519 --> 00:05:29.959 thing. Not before. No, or, for example, giving like to 69 00:05:30.000 --> 00:05:31.680 an old photo to say here I am. Hey, let me see that 70 00:05:31.759 --> 00:05:34.519 I' ve seen all your instagram. It used to be much better. 71 00:05:34.519 --> 00:05:38.800 You used to see the brave people, really, those people who called the 72 00:05:38.879 --> 00:05:43.160 landline of the person they liked. And it' s really people if they 73 00:05:43.160 --> 00:05:46.920 don' t know what a landline is, be happy, because all we 74 00:05:46.000 --> 00:05:48.839 know, what it is are people at risk. I' m telling you 75 00:05:48.879 --> 00:06:00.399 right now, uh, we' re getting older, uh, you remember 76 00:06:00.439 --> 00:06:03.920 what I mean, that phone call didn' t start when it was called 77 00:06:04.000 --> 00:06:06.360 that call started the day before. Hey, I' ll call you tomorrow 78 00:06:06.399 --> 00:06:11.920 at 8: 30. You' re gonna take it, yeah, sure, 79 00:06:12.120 --> 00:06:13.839 no, yeah, please, don' t fuck your father, no, 80 00:06:14.040 --> 00:06:15.199 no, no, no, I swear to you at half past eight. 81 00:06:15.480 --> 00:06:25.439 The next day I was calling your hairstyle pi and everything, uh, 82 00:06:25.959 --> 00:06:29.600 pee for God' s sake, I didn' t fuck the father, 83 00:06:29.800 --> 00:06:46.920 for God' s sake, Pi, Pi who' s hello, very 84 00:06:46.920 --> 00:06:50.000 good. We called him from Abon how about uh you didn' t have 85 00:06:50.000 --> 00:07:05.160 another one. If you remember what Bon is, take care of that cough 86 00:07:06.360 --> 00:07:11.759 and watch your eye there, which is also true that we always mess with 87 00:07:11.759 --> 00:07:14.800 social media. Truth It is not that social networks, but that they have 88 00:07:14.800 --> 00:07:17.000 lied to us all their lives in movies, have lied to us forever, 89 00:07:17.600 --> 00:07:21.759 forever, for example, showering in pairs in movies as it is. That 90 00:07:21.800 --> 00:07:26.319 ' s wonderful You' ve showered as a couple before You' ve seen 91 00:07:26.399 --> 00:07:30.879 the loss of dignity that you have, that is, in the film as 92 00:07:30.000 --> 00:07:34.800 that person is, it' s not going to make a heterosexual couple, 93 00:07:35.480 --> 00:07:38.959 not that man breast or giant. Not the guy takes off his T- 94 00:07:39.079 --> 00:07:42.680 shirt, not and closet, a four- door potter with a stick and 95 00:07:42.759 --> 00:07:45.959 everything not the guy and tells him we go to the shower honey and they 96 00:07:46.040 --> 00:07:47.480 both go to the shower all very nice. They enter that bathroom that fits 97 00:07:47.519 --> 00:07:50.399 your floor, in the bathroom that they have there and is there, in 98 00:07:50.439 --> 00:07:55.879 the bathroom all wonderful, a plate of giant showers. Enter he takes off 99 00:07:55.959 --> 00:08:00.600 his shirt, all full of abs or a hair, short toenails. True, 100 00:08:01.680 --> 00:08:03.160 there are people who are finding out and whose toenails. Is it cut? 101 00:08:03.240 --> 00:08:07.680 Is it cut? It' s her, isn' t it, 102 00:08:07.680 --> 00:08:11.759 her? Perfectly takes off the Minnesota timewors shirt, not you. The best 103 00:08:11.759 --> 00:08:13.120 thing about your entire Bride' s T- shirt would be that of Betti 104 00:08:13.160 --> 00:08:16.480 ' s spon, not the Minnesota Tumbleword, not that lady. And now 105 00:08:16.519 --> 00:08:20.120 take her. He' s taking off his cigarette. The cigarette goes down 106 00:08:20.120 --> 00:08:24.160 perfectly, gives more than unbuttoning. The button' s down, the cigarette 107 00:08:24.160 --> 00:08:26.680 ' s looking. I know people who have had to bury with the cigarette, 108 00:08:26.199 --> 00:08:28.199 uh, when you take off the cigarette gets to the ankle level, 109 00:08:28.279 --> 00:08:39.159 you get to step on the toss, that' s what. But that 110 00:08:39.159 --> 00:08:41.279 ' s not the end of it. R takes the take my colleague not 111 00:08:41.440 --> 00:08:45.679 without domineering t- shirts. He takes off his underpants, no, and 112 00:08:45.720 --> 00:08:48.440 you can see there' s security white underpants. He' s sure when 113 00:08:48.519 --> 00:08:54.120 that goes down there there' s no bike braking I understand there, no, 114 00:08:54.360 --> 00:08:56.639 no, no, that' s perfect, everything, perfect, everything 115 00:08:56.720 --> 00:08:58.679 doesn' t get off perfect and now they' re both in the shower. 116 00:08:58.759 --> 00:09:01.960 Not her, too, it' s going to show that a movie 117 00:09:03.039 --> 00:09:05.279 is already going suit- and- gown that you say. That' s 118 00:09:05.279 --> 00:09:07.559 movie. That' s also a dream in your dough in your house, 119 00:09:07.600 --> 00:09:11.240 pussy, is that it' s very rare not everything and now loosed of 120 00:09:11.320 --> 00:09:13.919 panties game that you say. Of course, I want you to know about 121 00:09:13.000 --> 00:09:16.080 this award panties that you' ll say gas. If there are types of 122 00:09:16.080 --> 00:09:18.679 panties, uh premium panties not what you buy yourself, not what you say. 123 00:09:18.840 --> 00:09:20.759 You' re so new not kind of that already the one who uses 124 00:09:20.799 --> 00:09:22.279 your peace sport to sleep that it' s already a little bit of a 125 00:09:22.279 --> 00:09:26.559 do. Then there' s the till and the panties three, since the 126 00:09:26.559 --> 00:09:30.279 last step, which is the rule Braga, which is that many guys don 127 00:09:30.399 --> 00:09:33.399 ' t know or we applaud. Don' t let' s not do 128 00:09:37.000 --> 00:09:43.440 this better than half ch. We' re not going to stay there, 129 00:09:43.279 --> 00:09:46.639 uh, the Braga, the rules are the ones that were in Braga Premium, 130 00:09:46.960 --> 00:09:48.399 which are the panties of today' s game at home. Then she 131 00:09:48.440 --> 00:09:50.320 must have walked a little bit of herself and Braga. Third, it' 132 00:09:50.399 --> 00:09:52.480 s obviously the Braga, which he doesn' t use at all says po 133 00:09:52.480 --> 00:09:56.080 for the rule. The case I' m going to gives you a stain 134 00:09:56.159 --> 00:09:58.039 on the way forward. What it means is that the two of them get 135 00:09:58.080 --> 00:10:01.120 into the shower Everything is perfesing this wonderful. They start kissing the waterfall water. 136 00:10:01.679 --> 00:10:05.120 You both like water or cold heat. There' s no fight there, 137 00:10:07.120 --> 00:10:09.480 uh, and it doesn' t happen to anyone who opens up in 138 00:10:09.480 --> 00:10:11.120 the shower who drops the water from here who doesn' t expect it is 139 00:10:11.120 --> 00:10:15.360 cold his dead. That doesn' t happen. The movie doesn' t 140 00:10:15.360 --> 00:10:24.919 happen. And then you' ve seen yourself shower as a couple. If 141 00:10:24.960 --> 00:10:26.759 you' ve been so lucky, let' s take a shower first. 142 00:10:26.840 --> 00:10:30.080 No, not the two of you by the shower, I don' t 143 00:10:30.080 --> 00:10:33.080 give it a to. If you don' t touch my hair today, 144 00:10:33.279 --> 00:10:35.559 I see my hair yesterday. It' s just that the movie' s 145 00:10:35.639 --> 00:10:37.080 always been plastered two days before to get it to her hair. No, 146 00:10:37.559 --> 00:10:39.840 or I' m in fourth year. First thing takes your shirt off. 147 00:10:41.360 --> 00:10:45.679 You look down all full of hair. The only mark that you have a 148 00:10:45.720 --> 00:10:48.279 red mark. Here and here from what comes, being the belly, not 149 00:10:48.360 --> 00:10:52.080 the Michelines. It' s like this, it' s all full of 150 00:10:52.399 --> 00:10:54.360 red wa or it doesn' t lift you up and now it' s 151 00:10:54.360 --> 00:10:56.799 looking at you. You start taking off your white cardon, too, because 152 00:10:56.879 --> 00:11:00.840 he' s played you. You try to hide it a little bit because 153 00:11:00.919 --> 00:11:11.519 of course you try to put it, because there is code qr ay there, 154 00:11:11.759 --> 00:11:16.279 there you scan mobile and it comes out sample of total things that you 155 00:11:16.279 --> 00:11:18.600 hide it under the mats of the feet keeps it, there you don' 156 00:11:18.639 --> 00:11:24.720 t put the carpet of the feet and now you see she takes off her 157 00:11:24.759 --> 00:11:26.399 shirt, doesn' t take off her dicks badly because it costs like I 158 00:11:26.399 --> 00:11:28.759 told you, no and now you both go. Shower shower plate. It 159 00:11:28.799 --> 00:11:31.120 ' s very small, very small. She likes cold water, you like 160 00:11:31.120 --> 00:11:35.159 hot water there Now you can' t give br sonia, because the aguaca 161 00:11:35.200 --> 00:11:37.639 fits all wrong. I mean, it' s already clear in the movie 162 00:11:37.799 --> 00:11:39.799 You' ve seen it That looks like the sun circus making love. You 163 00:11:39.799 --> 00:11:41.879 go there, I go here, you go there and you, uncomfortable already 164 00:11:41.919 --> 00:11:45.879 turning around, not clear. Besides, you look at you and you see 165 00:11:45.879 --> 00:11:48.480 that it is full of hair and hair with the glass of the screen that 166 00:11:50.039 --> 00:11:54.360 makes jae suit you every time it turns to you sounds and then you look 167 00:11:54.360 --> 00:12:05.600 at yourself, thank you, but it looks at the feet that you have 168 00:12:05.639 --> 00:12:07.080 said in the other one, not in the movie. You have seen perfectly 169 00:12:07.159 --> 00:12:11.399 those feet and on your feet that there are long nails and, above all 170 00:12:11.480 --> 00:12:16.360 and more important, the hairs that come out between the nail and what is 171 00:12:16.360 --> 00:12:18.639 base foot, okay, foot, base, nail. Here' s a 172 00:12:18.720 --> 00:12:20.360 hole that looks like God said these hairs are left over from my ass. 173 00:12:20.600 --> 00:12:24.240 We' re going around here. I mean, that' s what and 174 00:12:24.240 --> 00:12:26.279 good. And I' m going to tell you one thing and pray, 175 00:12:26.519 --> 00:12:31.879 pray for a shower plate, because what a fabric the loss of your dignity 176 00:12:31.919 --> 00:12:35.440 when you take off your underwear and whatever the tub you have the eggs hanging. 177 00:12:35.679 --> 00:12:37.200 That' s disgusting and I' ll tell you one thing. The 178 00:12:37.240 --> 00:12:41.840 coss leaves hanging. It' s me who has the car parked two petillas. 179 00:12:41.879 --> 00:13:00.000 Thank you very much, bye or s or we are chas. Thank 180 00:13:00.000 --> 00:12:54.919 you. S. S. S.