Welcome to the Parenting Roundabout Podcasts for the week of May one, twenty twenty
three. I'm Nicol Artics and I'm here with Katherine Heleco. Hello. Every
week we chat about what parents are talking, complaining, and obsessing about right
now. But this week we're short one podcaster as Terry recuperates from surgery and
we forced her to take a few days off, So we thought we'd take
a look back at some of our past discussions on encounters with sickness, health
and healthcare. Today's chat is originally from twenty nineteen. And you know what,
I am sick of being sick. That is my complaint for today because
legitimately I am sick again. Oh dear that kind of year. But I
mean I have no problem working my way through a cold. I mean,
nobody wants to be sick. But I have a problem with is that my
family does not seem to respect the fact that I have a cold. Of
course, that's that's my complaint. It's like there's man like, there's the
man flu, but what about the mom flew? Like can we not have
our own version where we just get to curl up in bed for a day
and everything around us will get like mysteriously taken care of, and our kids
will get picked up, and dinner will get made and we don't have to
direct anybody or and you won't finally emerge from your sick bed to find like
piles of dirty laundry and dirty dishes and dare and very dirty just as you
left it because you're loving spouse picked up the pieces while you get falling apart.
Is it just me? Or does anybody have like you know, do
they get to like do that? Do they get to retreat to their room
and and you know, spend some time on self care or do we just
pop some pills and keep going. When my kids were littler, I couldn't,
But now I think I could. My husband makes dinner and cleans up,
and he does most of the stuff around the house, and I just
work. So the only person who would miss me would be whoever I had
work due to Um, I think I could just kind of hide the room
so you could rent him out forever. The only thing is if if I
needed to drive my son to work, that would be a problem. Um.
Yeah, you can take a mom sick day, but the stroblem is
you can't take a freelance sick day. I can't take a freelance sick day.
Yeah. That's where my inability to take a sick day lies because um,
if I if I take a day off, I get no money and
that's a problem. And also I have deadlines, and you know, those
don't go away. I just get later on a whole bunch of things.
So that makes it less fun to just lay in bed to be sick.
Wow, you get to have the mom flu. I knock on wood.
You know, don't get sick very often. Oh you don't say that.
I know, Oh no, no, I know it's hard. Um,
but yeah, it would be very difficult because just dropping off and picking up
and yeah, you know, keeping on top of things. You know,
I go away frequently, like fairly frequently, and things generally can hang together
while but you know, I do tend to come home and find like piles
of clutter and unwashed clothing and things, um when I get back. So
I think that would be the equivalent. But I have a thing where I
would love to a lot of nights, I would love to read in bed
before I go to sleep, and my husband is always in there with the
light off, and that's when I'm like, you know, when you just
started like dragging through the day and you're like, I just want to you
know, that sounds light down, And I find that I am always you
know, the last one to bed and the first one mm because of just
stuff that needs to be done. So that's part of what I like about
going away, because I feel like I can be so productive on whatever it
is I'm there to do because I don't have all the day to day home
stuff to deal with. That makes sense, Yeah, I don't know.
I stay home and I get sick and things fall apart. I leave things
fall apart. You cannot. I can't wait. You know, when are
they not gonna need me? Though? Yeah? I think your kids are
at an age where they should be able to fend for themselves. They are,
and they're getting there. It's you know, I'm a big softy too
though, because, like I get, I let them get away with a
lot too. You know, they've got oh I'm studying for the m cat
got you know, all this ap homework to do, and I know it
legitimately takes up a lot of time another day. So yeah, I tend
to give them a free pass far too often. You're nice, Okay,
I'll do it. Well, now we need this. This is starting to
explain why you never get to be sick. You have to just say.
You just have to tell yourself, I am ill, I cannot do things.
I'm just going to stand bed. And then you have to listen to
yourself and not feel guilty and not feel like a martyr. Unfortunately, you
think about like if you were you know, your leg was broken or something
and you couldn't drive and you couldn't move around, somehow it would get done.
It might, I mean it might involve. For me, what it
would involve is a lot of calling in favors for other of other parents to
take my kids places. Yeah, wouldn't that be a good excuse though?
Yeah, well they would have to say, but they're not going to come
and wash my dishes either, so no, yeah, and it would have
to be something more dramatic than a simple gold or the flu. Well,
right, although I think I think, you know, my mom, friends,
my fellow like hockey parents or whatever, I think we're all pretty happy
to help each other out if we can, and if we are if we
need to. You know, well, if someone asks me to go to
run their kids somewhere. They don't have to be like on their deathbed,
I will do it right. So yeah, and I guess I know now
that my kids are a bit older, it's a lot different. Of course,
when they were younger, right, Yeah, having to do that minute
to minute care, yeah, it seemed to be needed. But um,
but when they're younger too, you can like spark them in front of the
TV sleep, do you know what I mean? Like, there's certain things
that are easier, I think, and feed them cereal, right, isn't
that the truth? Actually last night, my son, Um, they were
hungry, and I said, you know what, I'm so busy trying to
get ready for the conference. You're going to have to deal with it.
They actually put together quite a nice meal. So well, hey, maybe
I just need to feign business more often. Yeah, suckers, Now you
know they can do it, or just do what you did earlier today and
take some cold medicine and just pass out so that they're you know, you
were just unable to help them. Everybody. I mean, I'm I'm unable
to be available for anybody, but everything, you know, casts to keep
going. I mean, my kids were a lot better. I have to
admit, my kids were a lot better when I was working out away from
the home. They were a lot more, especially my son, who was
a lot more independent and could do things. And so when I got sick,
you know, it wasn't too big. But it's like they regressed now
that I've been at home for the last Anyways, independent skills, yeah,
it's very much about, like, you know, what what the expectations are
and what they get used to and like, yes, the other day my
son surprised me in a good way because he was at home. My husband
was at home, but he was working in he was going to be on
a conference call, so he really couldn't do anything. And I had to
go out and a repairman was coming, so I said, you know,
you are going to need to be the one that opens the door and shows
them in. And you know he knows what to do, but you I
need you to, you know, be aware of the doorbell, like open
the door, put away the dogs, all that stuff. And when I
came home, not only had he done that, he actually shoveled snow in
the wall in the front walk because he knew that this person was coming and
he wanted to. So I was very prize. That is very good.
I guess I'm surprised you Well, I've been doing something lately that is giving
me the feel of having a sick day, whether I'm actually having one or
not, which is that when I wake up in the morning, instead of
thinking about all the things I have to do, get up, take a
shower, breakfast, do this, do the treadmill, whatever, and then
like rolling over and going back to sleep and then starting my work really late,
I just sit up in bed, grab my laptop and start working right
there in bed with the pillows propped up behind me. I call out for
my daughter to bring me a cup of coffee and a breakfast bar, and
then I just spend the morning working and dad, and it's worked out really
good in terms of getting work done, and I kind of feel like,
well, you know, here I am sequestered in my room, having people
bringing me things and playing with my computer. So maybe if you ever need
a sick day, try that. That's it for today's Sickness and Health Chat.
Tune in tomorrow for another take on this theme. We're always interested in
what you have to say, so drop us a comment on our website,
our Facebook page, or Twitter, where you will find us at roundabout chat